panicorlove is offline panicorlove Post #1  November 6,2011, 1:56am
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I'm really looking for help here and hope the community can make me feel better and figure out how to find love while having panic disorder.

I am a 25 year old guy from southern California. I was perfectly happy and normal until 3 years I developed panic disorder. I was very bad at first, could not leave the house or even my bedroom. Now 3 years later, I feel better but still can barely leave the house. The only way I left the house was with my ex of 4 years (which cheated on me 6 months ago).

Now I am going through some bad depression of how I will ever meet another girl or find love again. I am hopeless. Other than having a problem leaving the house, I'm good looking and run a successful business from home. I'm funny, kind and devoted.

What should I do? I have added the following to my profile, what do you guys and especially girls think??

wrote :
PS. I have something called panic disorder (similar to anxiety). But it makes me who I am and has put me where I'm at. What's that mean to you? Well, I'd probably have to get to know you very well before a first date, I appreciate every tiny thing in life and you'd never catch me talking to another girl. Cons: it's hard to go out for me, especially on a first date. Pros: once I get to know you, I can go anywhere and love to explore the world while holding your hand and simply sharing every moment and experience in life; I'm 100% loyal, supportive and devoted; I know how to commit. I'm here looking for my match and understanding, ready to give back completely. I am 100% stable emotionally, financially and physically. I work hard and am very successful, looking for the one girl to share my life with.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #2  November 6,2011, 8:55am
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I'm crippled by the fear That I've fallen too far to love

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Are you under the care of a competent professional who is familiar with treating panic disorder? If not then you need to seek help. If you are being treated for your panic disorder and it is not helping then you may want to seek a second opinion. What you need is well beyond whatever encouragement that we can give you through these Advice boards.

What you have posted as having in your profile, I would not put. It is one thing to mention that you have panic disorder. But the rest of what you have is too much too soon and just inappropriate in your profile.
 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #3  November 6,2011, 9:11am
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No one has to be perfect , but......... it is your responsibility to manage and have a handle on this..... not your wife's or future girlfriends.........try to focus more on the success you do have...looks, business, financial etc.........Good Luck.
panicorlove wrote :
I am a 25 year old guy from southern California. I was perfectly happy and normal until 3 years I developed panic disorder. I was very bad at first, could not leave the house or even my bedroom. Now 3 years later, I feel better but still can barely leave the house. The only way I left the house was with my ex of 4 years
Now I am going through some bad depression of how I will ever meet another girl or find love again. I am hopeless. Other than having a problem leaving the house, I'm good looking and run a successful business from home. I'm funny, kind and devoted.
Even with understanding your condition....this is rationalizing and making it the other persons burden to deal with , more as a daycare nurse or baby-sitter...... would leave this out of a profile.
panicorlove wrote :
PS. I have something called panic disorder (similar to anxiety). But it makes me who I am and has put me where I'm at. What's that mean to you? Well, I'd probably have to get to know you very well before a first date, I appreciate every tiny thing in life and you'd never catch me talking to another girl. Cons: it's hard to go out for me, especially on a first date. Pros: once I get to know you, I can go anywhere and love to explore the world while holding your hand and simply sharing every moment and experience in life; I'm 100% loyal, supportive and devoted; I know how to commit. I'm here looking for my match and understanding, ready to give back completely. I am 100% stable emotionally, financially and physically. I work hard and am very successful, looking for the one girl to share my life with
 
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Ingytravel is online now Ingytravel Post #4  November 6,2011, 9:15am
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I also wonder if you are under the care of a good Dr. to help you overcome this with both medication and therapy.

I'm not sure it's the best time to be trying to date someone. Especially since you still seem to be recovering from the break up you just went through.

I definitely think that what you wrote on your profile will scare most people away as you make it sound like it's going to be their responsibility to 'hold your hand' and get out there in the world.

Most people are not going to want to go to your house for a first date or not be able to enjoy being active in a regular relationship.

As well as you say you are 100% emotionally and physically stable. Well...that isn't true so you contradict yourself.

Personally, I would recommend spending the next 6 months to a year to truly work with a Psychiatrist or Psychologist to get you back to a healthy place as you were 3 years ago.

Then you can be open and truly ready to find a relationship where you can offer being a truly emotionally stable partner.
 
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Rainbow215 is offline Rainbow215 Post #5  November 8,2011, 2:27pm
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I agree with the above posters about treatment. Cognitive behavioral therapy for panic disorder is actually one of the most effective treatments among psychological interventions for mental health issues, and best of all it is brief - often 12-16 sessions or less. Medication can also be very helpful. Just my opinion, but I think that making an investment in yourself now by seeking treatment would be worth it in the long run - both for your confidence with dating as well as your overall quality of life I agree with Ingy that what you wrote could come off as a red flag so I'd recommend against putting it in your profile. But luckily it sounds like you have a ton of great qualities so I think once your anxiety is less of a barrier you'll be good to go!
 
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Alauren Marie is offline Alauren Marie Post #6  November 26,2011, 8:39pm
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I understand completely where you are coming from. I am a 21 year old female also struggling with panic disorder, so serve that I can't hold down a steady job, or even going to the grocery store is an ordeal. I also suffer from panic attacks as well. I hope we could chat with each other, maybe we could help each other.
 
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