to have sex or not to have sex?


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fame is offline fame Post #1  August 2,2010, 1:15am
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You meet someone and feel the sexual heat from the hand shake, say goodbye but dont exchange numbers. Then within one week bump into him 3 different times. Exchange numbers and hang out for a couple of hours. everything is great including conversation. The Female makes the first move and then you have great sex.
What are you thinking of the women?
Should y'all have waited?
Does it ruin the chase from the males perspective?
If so how can the women savage this ?
Please answer any one question.
 
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Cape_Codder is offline Cape_Codder Post #2  August 2,2010, 3:55am

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Anytime you immediately start second guessing yourself right after you have done something, that in itself is an indicator that you should have given yourself a little more time. It's done, second guessing will not change things, now focus and figure out where you stand with him.

Whether it changes his perception of how he thinks about you will only be known by giving it time and seeing how he relates to you. He may lose interest and not contact you. He may contact you because he just wants a psychical relationship or, he may want to pursue a full relationship.

His motivations and actions will tell you what he wants. If it's just sex, that will be the central and only reason to see you. If he cares about the person, he's going to want to find out all about you and begin asking the right questions. In short, he will want to spend time with you outside of the bedroom.

Let things develop naturally, don't try to push the issue of a relationship now. If you attempt to pressure him for answers as to how he views your relationship now, he could just walk.
 
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Dafearon is offline Dafearon Post #3  August 2,2010, 6:55am
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This question is not fair.

These question do not address motive of the guy. The motive will dictate the answers of these questions.

However, I will answer it for me, as being a male

What are you thinking of the women?: I'm hoping we have a connection that made our relationship move faster than normal.

Should y'all have waited?: This question is seriously flawed as well. Sometimes, yes, because we might have moved so fast, we skipped some important steps. Sometimes, no because we went through those important steps and it was just right.

Does it ruin the chase from the males perspective?: For me, no. It DOES change the relationship because in my opinion, sex "fast tracks" the relationship because intimacy is thrown in so soon. But it can only ruin if sex occurs with expectations that were never conveyed.

If so how can the women savage this ?: Again, this question is flawed. Salvage means there was something there to salvage to begin with. Sometimes, sex is just sex and no more. But, if something was there, communication is key to moving from this point.
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #4  August 2,2010, 8:01am
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fame wrote :
You meet someone and feel the sexual heat from the hand shake, say goodbye but dont exchange numbers. Then within one week bump into him 3 different times. Exchange numbers and hang out for a couple of hours. everything is great including conversation. The Female makes the first move and then you have great sex.
ok...got it so far.
wrote :
What are you thinking of the women?
I'm thinking about how to do this again because I like it...and obviously she does as well.
wrote :
Should y'all have waited?
waited for what, our STD test to come back?? the next lunar eclipse??
what are we supposedly waiting for?

wrote :
Does it ruin the chase from the males perspective?
there was no chase involved, because the man, in this example never did any chasing, therefore it didn't ruin something that simply never existed.

wrote :
If so how can the women savage this ?
What's there to salvage?

wrote :
Please answer any one question.
I answered all of them.
Last edited by TheThinker; August 2,2010 at 8:04am.
 
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hankscorpio is offline hankscorpio Post #5  August 2,2010, 8:39am

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TheThinker wrote :
What's there to salvage?
She must want to try to run Nanette's never-get-anywhere program on the guy.

I agree, if she's looking to start playing games and getting him to chase her then it's already too late for that garbage.
 
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RoxyRedhead is offline RoxyRedhead Post #6  August 2,2010, 8:57am

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Each of your questions can have a different answer because no man thinks exactly like the next and many will have a totally different impression about the woman in question.

Just as different women will respond differently to the situation.

You need to focus on YOU instead of on what the guy thinks..you have no control over his thoughts on this.

If you are uncomfortable with your actions, consider not duplicating that behavior the next time you get instant spark with a guy..

Your post, to me, reads like the epitome of an insure woman--if you don't consider yourself insecure then you might try to reassess yourself as regards casual sex and establish some boundaries that make you more comfortable.
 
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frogprince is offline frogprince Post #7  August 2,2010, 5:25pm
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I don't get the a man won't be interested in you if you have sex right away thinking. That would never come into my mind. Have great sex with somone like them as a person I will want to see them again.
 
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autumnnights is offline autumnnights Post #8  August 2,2010, 5:52pm
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Ladies please take your time when it comes to physical intimacy, you don't have anything to lose! And if you do lose him due to his inability to keep it in his pants then he wasn't someone worth keeping around in the beginning!Yes, you may be into each other and it may seem like the right moment, but take time to feel that you know each other, and that he wants you for your other qualities as well. If sex is all he's interested in you will find out quickly by his impatience! He won't feel bad after the fact if you end up in a split, you will be the one who's gonna get hurt emotionally. Let him show he cares and appreciates you for who you are as a person, and then and only then should you engage in physical intimacy.
 
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Raw_Truth is offline Raw_Truth Post #9  August 2,2010, 9:03pm
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Nah, having sex right away doesn't matter to the guy. He has labeled you short term or long term material within the first 10 seconds of meeting you - THIS is the hard question to answer. You'll just have to judge the next few days accordingly - does he call when he says he will, does he return messages, does he want to see you again?
 
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1Horselady is offline 1Horselady Post #10  August 2,2010, 9:22pm
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frogprince wrote :
I don't get the a man won't be interested in you if you have sex right away thinking. That would never come into my mind. Have great sex with somone like them as a person I will want to see them again.
Some guys after getting sex from a women, will just cut and run, because sex was all they wanted in the first place. It's the difference between a one night stand, and a lifetime committment.


Suzie
 
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