zal is offline zal Post #21  July 28,2010, 1:26pm
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sweetangel58 wrote :
Why do so many men's profiles say that they want an atttractive woman? Being attractive does not have anything to do with love. The ones that say it really have not looked in the mirror. Am I being to harsh. Don't men and woman know that it is what is on the inside and not on the ourside. Confused???
For the same reason that "so many" women's profiles say that they want a financially secure man. Personal choice.
 
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mary_mary is offline mary_mary Post #22  July 28,2010, 1:51pm

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zal wrote :
For the same reason that "so many" women's profiles say that they want a financially secure man. Personal choice.
Uh ...... you may not have noticed this ..... but "personal choice" isn't actually a reason for doing something.

Q. Why are you jumping off that bridge?
A. Personal choice.

It is someone's personal choice to do something.

That is not their reason for doing it.

Nice try, though. You never know, somebody might have thought that was meaningful, and that someone else objected to people having and exercising choice ...
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #23  July 28,2010, 2:31pm
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If a woman doesn't consider herself "attractive" according to that standard, she will not consider communicating with that man. So if he meant something else, he may be the loser. Of course, he may be the loser even if he did mean that, but that's his choice.
Conversely, if she doesn't buy into this theory and actually decides to give him the benefit of the doubt and let him, (instead of a pre conceived notion, or something she's read about and fostered in her own mind) decide what attractive means she may find that he actually finds her attractive, and vice-versa.

But...that takes a confident woman, who's secure enough with herself to do that.
Last edited by TheThinker; July 28,2010 at 2:33pm.
 
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zal is offline zal Post #24  July 28,2010, 3:45pm
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mary_mary wrote :
Uh ...... you may not have noticed this ..... but "personal choice" isn't actually a reason for doing something.

Q. Why are you jumping off that bridge?
A. Personal choice.

It is someone's personal choice to do something.

That is not their reason for doing it.

Nice try, though. You never know, somebody might have thought that was meaningful, and that someone else objected to people having and exercising choice ...
 
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mary_mary is offline mary_mary Post #25  July 28,2010, 6:01pm

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TheThinker wrote :
Conversely, if she doesn't buy into this theory and actually decides to give him the benefit of the doubt and let him, (instead of a pre conceived notion, or something she's read about and fostered in her own mind) decide what attractive means she may find that he actually finds her attractive, and vice-versa.

But...that takes a confident woman, who's secure enough with herself to do that.
Or conversely, it could just take a woman who just hasn't wasted enough time on frogs yet and doesn't know a waste of time when she sees it.

I don't think women are alone in not wanting to start off a communication process by trying to persuade someone that they are worthy of notice even though they don't meet the stated standards.

If men want to get replies from women, the men are the ones who should frame their criteria in such a way that they will attract the notice and attention of appropriate women.

If someone says he's looking for an "attractive" woman, I'll take him at his word, myself. And I won't reply, not because I'm not "attractive", but because he isn't. I have my standards, you know!
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #26  July 28,2010, 6:13pm
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mary_mary wrote :

If someone says he's looking for an "attractive" woman, I'll take him at his word, myself. And I won't reply, not because I'm not "attractive", but because he isn't. I have my standards, you know!
I don't blame you.
Like I said, it takes confidence to put yourself out there

And a wise person knows their limitations.
 
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ian80au is offline ian80au Post #27  July 29,2010, 1:43am
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As has already been stated Attractiveness is a subjective thing. For me she doesn't have to be a glamour to be attractive. I like real girl next door types myself. Also I have to admit that I find the more buxom ones attractive too.
 
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morningsunlight is offline morningsunlight Post #28  July 29,2010, 2:06am
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To me, attractiveness is not just physical beauty, but the whole package.
 
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ian80au is offline ian80au Post #29  July 31,2010, 7:47pm
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morningsunlight wrote :
To me, attractiveness is not just physical beauty, but the whole package.
Exactly
 
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