TiffyKey is offline TiffyKey Post #1  March 27,2010, 2:36pm
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I'm moving to Colorado Springs and want to know whether to wait until I move to start looking for someone great there. I have opportunities here but have been turning them down because I don't want to get involved emotionally and then have to pack up and leave.
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #2  March 27,2010, 2:40pm
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I think your reasoning is fine.

I suggest, that a year or more will be too long for many people to wait for you to arrive, so I think you are best off stating in your profile where you live, and when and why you'll be moving.
 
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TiffyKey is offline TiffyKey Post #3  March 27,2010, 2:47pm
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I agree with that answer completely. I am moving only 6hours from my current city in New Mexico. The second part of my question is do I date here before I move? You know Murphy's law, I'm afraid I'll meet the right guy and have to leave him behind.
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #4  March 27,2010, 3:35pm
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I would not worry over that - a new relationship will often (usually?) end, for a great variety of reasons.

In any case, think about if you (or he) had no current plan to move, and then one of you had a job change, an ill parent, or some other issue which made moving necessary?

Your relationship would either survive or not, but that is no different than any other relationship.

***

I am used to having relationships which I knew would end; in my case, due to school or employment. I had no difficulty finding partners who were fine with that.

In my view, it is fine for you to date in your current location, and also fine to put a profile in your planned location.

Just being honest about it is all a person has a right to expect.
 
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Oregon_Coast_Guy is offline Oregon_Coast_Guy Post #5  March 27,2010, 6:57pm
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No point in starting something you know will end, right? Since you will not emptionally invest yourelf, there is no reason to get involved and get a guy emotionally invested.
 
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RoxyRedhead is offline RoxyRedhead Post #6  March 27,2010, 9:53pm

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I think it's fairly easy to indicate a desire for 'dating just to date' . I've done this for a couple of years with no problems and a lot of fun, companionship and so on, as I'm not interested in marriage.

One thing you might consider, though, is paying your own way as you social-date. Well, actually, I'm a proponent of paying my own way in any case, but especially if I'm not interested in a LTR, expecting the guy to foot the bill for my entertainment is pretty self-centered, IMO.

Good luck on your move and dating future!
 
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TiffyKey is offline TiffyKey Post #7  March 28,2010, 4:02am
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I agree with what you are saying as well as Roxy. I am becoming invested emotionally in one person that I didn't believe would consider moving but today he said he is seriously thinking about it. Maybe after dating during the time I have left here we will be ready to move together. It's surprising what can happen in a day. I feel I can let my heart go a little. I'm going to hope for the best!
If it doesn't work I'll just date for fun like Roxy said. I agree on treating each other to dates. I would never date someone for fun and mislead them or use them. Right now I am telling men I talk to right away that I will be moving. I think I'm going about my situation the right way and appreciate the reassurance.
 
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