luke9909 is offline luke9909 Post #1  November 23,2009, 4:50pm
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so theres this girl i started talking to not long ago. we started with eharmony email, and moved to using our actual email accounts. we really connect, but the one problem is that she wants to start texting and i wont have time to meet in person until after thanksgiving... ive heard a lot of bad things about texting early on in a relationship, just that you can get stuck without actually moving forward... any advice or opinions would be appriciated!!
 
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ami1uwant is online now ami1uwant Post #2  November 24,2009, 11:27am
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What are these storiess you heard about texting??? I have never heard stories about how texting can cause a relationship to get stuck.
 
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kevin76 is offline kevin76 Post #3  November 24,2009, 1:06pm
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There are a few old technophobes who think texting is of teh devil. Don't worry about them.

Texting can't get a relationship 'stuck' any more than emails can get a relationship 'stuck.' In other words, it can happen if you let it, but if it does it's not because of the texting, it's because you failed to move forward when you got the chance.

One question I would ask - have you spoken on the phone yet? If not, why not? You have to have her phone number to text, right, so why not call?
Texting is not necessarily bad, but if you have the chance to call that's even better.
 
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Dafearon is offline Dafearon Post #4  November 24,2009, 1:17pm
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Thanksgiving is in two days. I don't think that will be a major hurdle considering most people will be busy for the holidays.

Even though I despise texting, communication is key. Lack of communication, is bad. I would go ahead and text and see if you can get it to something more tangible like an eventual meet.

The only setback with texting, is like email where you're stuck corresponding, but not actually connecting. If texting is progressing the "relationship", then go for it.
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #5  November 24,2009, 1:33pm
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If you can txt then you can also pick up the phone and call. Since Thanksgiving is essentially here, the time is not really that big of an issue. You call call/txt chat and pick a concrete date to meet after the holidays. The only pitfall of txting is the same as e-mails - since you can't hear the tone, things can be easily misinterpreted.
 
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nightling is offline nightling Post #6  November 24,2009, 1:45pm
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I am personally of the mind that I don't want to start a lot of texting online with a person I haven't met in real life. They may not look like their picture, they may not be who they present themselves to be in text/email, and I don't want to build a false sense of intimacy with them until I know they are who they say they are. I would tell her you can spend some time texting for an hour on a specific date, but that you'll otherwise be occupied with family and that you're looking forward to meeting her as soon as after Thanksgiving as possible.
 
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melman is offline melman Post #7  November 24,2009, 3:32pm
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kevin76 wrote :
There are a few old technophobes who think texting is of teh devil. Don't worry about them.
Texting is for people that are too lazy or frightened to use the d**n phone.

But it doesn't matter either way because a total stranger isn't going to get my phone number. If a match wants to talk on the phone, she has to give me her number. And so far it has never happened. I ask to meet and we go from there.
 
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meanminicooper is offline meanminicooper Post #8  November 28,2009, 3:42pm
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Texting email, and even phone conversations should, by in large, be a bridge to get you to face to face talk.

During my dating days, I hated nothing more than the 10:43am text on a tuesday "What up?"
 
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