Argh, screwed up with new guy.

I went on 2 dates with an amazing guy. Both dates lasted about 5 hours, from 8PM until about 2AM. No sex, just a little necking. I intend on withholding sex until I'm in a commited relationship. My date knows this.

Anyway, since the first minute we've had a million things to talk about. Never any awkward silence. We are so comfortable with each other. We even joke about how similar we are.

After the first date, my grandpa passed away unexpectedly. I flew to Ohio for the funeral. I was devastated. I shared my sadness with my new guy, mostly in the form of texts. In 1 or 2 texts I stated I was very sad but also at peace that my grandpa was in heaven.

When I got off the plane to come home, we met for our second date. I was in good spirits. I chatted on about memories with Grandpa. I also very causally mentioned that my grandpa was a big part of my life due to having abusive stepfathers. My grandpa became my "father" figure and that's why we were close. I also stated that after years of therapy and with God's help, I overcame my child abuse and I forgave my abusers. This was probably a 5 minute conversation tops. It was NOT the main focus of our date. I also mentioned in passing being in a homosexual relationship many years ago. No details.

The next day, he said he was "freaked out" that I shared "a ton of personal information" with him so soon. He said that 2 dates is WAY too early to share so much. I felt crushed and betrayed. Now I'm a little ticked as well. I trusted him, and felt comfortable sharing things. He too, shared personal information. Drug use, broken relationships. It's not fair! Plus, I have skeletons that I wouldn't think of sharing with him for a long time. I don't think my child abuse is a big part of who I am.

About me, I am very secure with myself. I don't feel ashamed of my past. There are plenty of things I have not shared with him, but this new guy seems to think I unloaded a ton of baggage on him. I told him I am a very trusting, intense, emotional person. I have a wide comfort zone. Better he know now so he can decide if he wants to go forward. I mentioned on the first date that I fall in love easily, but also have good coping skills to heal if things don't work out. That was another thing I said that freaked him out. He says he is just the opposite. I am accepting of that. I like him a lot and I can give him enough time to fall in love. It's a non-issue.

We were supposed to go out this Saturday. I suggested we play it cool for a while because now I am feeling insecure and wow... the BLOW to my ego was tough. I feel very stupid and I'm getting thoughts that he thinks I am this needy drama queen. I am not. I am very free spirited and I think chatting about the weather is a waste of time. Plus, if you spend an hour making out on both dates, sorry... but I feel it's okay to reveal a little more on the inside too.

Problem is, he actually WANTS to see me this Saturday, but I feel the dynamics have changed. I have to walk on eggshells and monitor what I say. He swears I don't have to do that, and to not worry. He still thinks I am smart and sexy, etc. But really, I don't know if I should see him or not. Should I play it cool?

dnnmllr, I brought it up. He asked me over to his house this Saturday and I said it would be tough to "resist" him and he asked why, and then I told him that I tend to delay sex. Since sex on a third date isn't a foreign topic to many people, I feel there's nothing wrong with making the boundaries known. Keep in mind we already made out a lot, so talking about sex shouldn't be an issue, but now after this I'm not so sure. I have no idea what else might be bugging him that I shared. I'm just upset because he also shared things with me and I'm not flying off the handle.