beautifulgenius is offline beautifulgenius Post #1  November 3,2009, 10:06pm
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My boyfriend is coming to visit and my ex is still in my life because of our girls. I am worried about some tension and am looking for suggestions on if and when they meet.....

Thanx,
BG

P.S.
Calling on all the heavy hitters like: Bravethestorm, LBMM, D_Lion, Hazmat ,Harvey7, JayJay, and the others for help. Thanx!!
Last edited by beautifulgenius; November 4,2009 at 3:19am.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #2  November 3,2009, 10:21pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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Well....if I was your boyfriend I'd want to see that your ex being 'still in your life' meant something along the lines of coming to your house, saying hi, picking up the girls....and saying goodbye.
 
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lil_lamb is offline lil_lamb Post #3  November 3,2009, 10:36pm
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is your ex cool?
 
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cardguy is offline cardguy Post #4  November 3,2009, 10:40pm
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not much to say unless you feel like elaborating on what "still in my life" means.
 
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SteveVance is offline SteveVance Post #5  November 3,2009, 11:36pm
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To me, still in my life means, still comes over to hang out and talk and stuff. If you wanted to say 'just picks up the kids and comes with you to parent teacher conferences' then say, "I still see him when he picks up my girls, but that is it.
 
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beautifulgenius is offline beautifulgenius Post #6  November 4,2009, 2:40am
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cardguy wrote :
not much to say unless you feel like elaborating on what "still in my life" means.
Nothing other than we tolerate each other for the kids, talk only when we have to, and my bf already knows and understands all this. He knows there is nothing going on.
 
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beautifulgenius is offline beautifulgenius Post #7  November 4,2009, 2:42am
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lil_lamb wrote :
is your ex cool?
He can be moody at times.
 
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beautifulgenius is offline beautifulgenius Post #8  November 4,2009, 2:45am
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jayjay wrote :
Well....if I was your boyfriend I'd want to see that your ex being 'still in your life' meant something along the lines of coming to your house, saying hi, picking up the girls....and saying goodbye.
That's what he does.
 
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beautifulgenius is offline beautifulgenius Post #9  November 4,2009, 2:59am
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Is there a good way and /or bad way to do this??.... is maybe what I am asking. My bf is coming a long way, and in case he does end up meeting my ex, I want to know the most reasonable way , if there is such a way, to meet. I understand there is tension, I can already feel it, but there is no need for it. And the guys who have answered this are not telling me anything new. I guess we will just have to deal with it , as the situation arises.
 
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the_unsnark is offline the_unsnark Post #10  November 4,2009, 3:09am
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Well, take any advice from me with a grain of salt, but I think honesty is always the best policy. It might help to unobtrusively (re)state what's going on - such as "Oh, B is here to take the girls to the park" or "B, A is here from _________." Still, I think there's a limit to how much tension you can get rid of in a situation like that. As long as everyone is civil...
Good luck!
 
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