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6dle899 6dle899 is offline
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6dle899 Losing faith in humanity. One person at a time.

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Sawyer76 wrote :
I know men dont take as many pictures as women and I don't expect that much of their pics. But why did he have to crop all 3? Was he wearing a cropped shirt that stopped after his shoulders and naked on the bottom?

There's really no way to tell if they are recent. Usually you can tell this by the quality of the pic or what's in the background etc. And being that this pic was cropped and is so close up, it's not as digitally crisp and you cant see anything in the background.

Frankly THAT says more about YOU than it does about HIM.

And maybe you are a leetle bit jaded.

~~~~~~~~~~~

From this end:

One picture of HER from the shoulders up is ok
if she is attractive, smiling and her shoulders are BARE or just spaghetti straps.

That would * indeed * suffice to capture and hold my interest..
- October 28th, 2009, 12:03 pm
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leiby leiby is offline
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Usually people having only one pic tend to look worse than that pic in person. And probably they know that and are not confident in their appearance.
- October 28th, 2009, 02:26 pm
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Sawyer76 Sawyer76 is offline
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Well if I have gained nothing else from these posts, I at least laughed A LOT. Thanks for al the advice.

OnleyJeeps....that was hysterical lol.

Geez, I never thought he might be in a wheelchair. But, whether it was a wheelchair or weight, any deceit would be an issue to me. But he lives in a city-like area so I can't imagine he would be handicap but who knows...ugh!

For some of the posts that suggested I ask for more pics, when he only had the 1 on his profile, I asked for 2 more which he sent in email. No he isn't shirtless in any of them. You can see he is wearing tshirts in each.

Well, last email was with these 2 pics and he gave me his number. I usually give my number to the guy. Do women call guys first? I prefer it the other way around.
- October 28th, 2009, 02:54 pm
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D_Lion D_Lion is offline
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Some woman want to call the man to avoid giving out her number, so he may have just assumed.

If you'd rather he call you, just ask him to.
- October 28th, 2009, 03:48 pm
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olneyjeeps olneyjeeps is offline
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olneyjeeps Like a match made in heaven, but it was made on EH.

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ScottK wrote :
Although a great idea, I don't believe this is the case.

My good friend is a quad, (diving accident as a kid), and has been on/off EHarmony a couple of times.
He absolutely, positively, shows his wheelchair both in the Photos, as well as mentioning his disability in his Profile as well.

Its just too big of thing NOT to show/tell.

Fact is, for a lot of people, it will be a big dealbreaker, and he knows that. There is no way he wants to get his hopes up on a match, only to have her find out about the wheelchair and bail.

As for the OP, for crying outloud, just meet up for a quick coffee date and find out.
No one is telling you that you MUST date the guy for 6 months, but I think an hour out of your life isn't too much to ask for, considering you are interested in him.

Will you be disappointed and he will be fat? Maybe.
Will you be happily suprised and find out he is built? Maybe.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
I like " You bet pennies, the most you will ever win is pennies."

alissag wrote :
Scarlet quoted me exactly!

I choose to let my written words and sparkling personality do the talking rather than a bunch of photos
And you don't look at their photos?
- October 28th, 2009, 09:04 pm
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Oregon_Coast_Guy Oregon_Coast_Guy is offline
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Oregon_Coast_Guy We're one of a kind like dip di-dip di-dip doo-bop a doo-bee do

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For one: If you are jaded, quit using internet dating. You're going to be looking for the reasons why your dates are single, rather than getting to know them for the person who they are.

Two: this guy is obviously hiding something. I would just tell him you aren't interested and move on.
- October 28th, 2009, 11:29 pm
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dure204 dure204 is offline
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This is a common ploy used by women with weight & body image problems. I didn't realize men did it as well.

If he sounds interesting enough why not just call him and set up a quick meeting with him to see him in the flesh? Then if you don't like what you see you can move on. There is no reason for you to wait for him to call if you truly have some interest. If nothing else you can find out if he is hiding anything and use that experience for future reference.
- October 29th, 2009, 07:32 am
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Tracey77 Tracey77 is offline
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I think you should just call and find out for yourself by meeting him
- October 29th, 2009, 08:39 am
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Sawyer76 Sawyer76 is offline
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Update: I called him last night and we had a very nice conversation. I gave him a few opportunities to "come clean" if he needed to when we were talking about our past dating experiences and I said I hated people who were dishonest..he agreed. I think he might just be new to online dating. He said the last time he tried it was 7 years ago when it was a free site and since then was dating work people and dates thru friends.

He definitely isn't handicapped because he said he "walks" around the city all the time. He also takes kickboxing several times a week. Maybe he's walking and taking kickboxing to lose all the weight? lol

Well he didn't ask me to get together and I didn't bring it up but he said he'd call me so I'll keep everyone posted once we meet. Thanks for all the advice!
- October 29th, 2009, 08:48 am
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alissag alissag is offline
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olneyjeeps wrote :

And you don't look at their photos?
Ha ha ha... Who said that? Judge if you will, it's all well and good. I will tell you this, for me, I READ every profile I get, however, I only click through the multiple photos if the profile has piqued my interest. I have closed plenty of "attractive" matches because what they included in their profile wasn't a good match for me.

The decision to post only one face shot is based on my previous experience with online dating. I don't have any weight or body image issues, but, if I wanted someone to communicate with me based strictly on what I looked like (that meat market mentality that Scarlet brought up), I'd go to a bar and meet people that way. Online dating happens to be a good way to filter, at least for me. My point was... I don't want photos to be the focus of my profile.

Everyone seems so jaded and quick to jump to negative conclusions. I just wanted people to see that there are other reasons a person might choose to post only one face shot.
- October 29th, 2009, 09:48 am
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