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byte's Avatar

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Hi all, I've been a member of eHarmony for 2 years but this is the first time I've posted in the forum.

This weekend I was finally matched with a girl that I'm really into. Based only on her profile of course, but she is my best match in 2 years!

Just wondering if people have any tips on how to make sure we get to communicating. I've already requested Guided Communication, so now the waiting game begins... I would love to get to know her better, so any ideas on what I can do to make sure she doesn't miss me?

Thanks!
- October 26th, 2009, 08:51 pm
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byte's Avatar

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Tried so far:
- icebreaker
- request Guided Communication
- nudge

Still to try:
- request FastTrack
- request secure call

I am not giving up on this girl!
- November 3rd, 2009, 07:17 pm
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littlebluemonkeymind meh

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LOL...breathe. It's a dance. You can't move unless she does. There's no guarantee she will and there's no way to make her. Frustrating, isn't it?

I recommend: a home improvement project; a course of reading the classics; a series of guitar lessons; a foreign language tape.

You've done all you can. I'm glad you got someone who seems interesting. Don't worry about her being The One or even The Only One. Just go with it.

Good luck. I hope it turns into something lovely for you.
- November 3rd, 2009, 07:24 pm
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CapnCrunch23's Avatar

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Really there are only two things I suggest..
1. Don't send anymore communication request.. She has received three from you already, anymore she's going to think you're pushy.
2. Be patient. You can't control the actions of others.. Dating is pace not chase!

With that said..I hope she is paying member and she responds.

Good luck..

Last edited by CaptCrunch23; November 3rd, 2009 at 07:28 pm.
- November 3rd, 2009, 07:25 pm
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Iconography's Avatar

Iconography doesn't know exactly what she's looking at, but is liking what she sees

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And if she's not a paying member now, she might become one if your profile looks attractive enough to her. Make sure your own profile looks as good as it possibly can, and be sure (even if she can't see them yet) your photos are more than adequate.

I hope it works out for you!
- November 3rd, 2009, 07:55 pm
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jayjay ...is relaxing.

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byte wrote :
Tried so far:
- icebreaker
- request Guided Communication
- nudge

Still to try:
- request FastTrack
- request secure call

I am not giving up on this girl!
Unfortunately, whether you 'give up' or not doesn't really matter. She has to want to communicate with you. My experience has been that because you think someone would be a good match doesn't mean the chances of her communicating with you are any better.
- November 3rd, 2009, 07:58 pm
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byte's Avatar

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Good points everyone, thanks.

Yes it is frustrating. Argh!!! I shall wait patiently
- November 3rd, 2009, 08:00 pm
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byte's Avatar

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I guess the concern in my mind is that she's getting so many matches (because she rocks!) that she might miss mine completely, which is why I was pushing to get her attention lol.

I know she has not seen my profile because she does not come up on my list of "Who's Viewed Me" and I have no anonymous views. Maybe she's just out of town, I'll keep it cool for now and wait...
- November 3rd, 2009, 08:12 pm
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melman's Avatar

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Calm down.

If you've been on eH for two years, you surely must know that most of your matches are inactive, which means that they will not ever respond to any communication.

But let's assume that she is a live one. She might view you and do nothing. She might view you and close immediately. Guided communication might fail for any number of reasons. Maybe she's meeting four matches this week already. Still hot for her?

You're already setting yourself up to fail. You've become attached to a picture and a profile. You're ready to chase someone that may or may not even be available. How does that make *her* want to meet *you*?

I know I'm being all wet-blanket-ish, but with 2 years on eH you've got to have enough experience to keep your hormones in check. Right?
- November 3rd, 2009, 08:54 pm
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2 years on EH and you're waiting patiently for her to respond? if you haven't heard anything back after a few days of your first attempt, you should keep your options open, definitely keep moving.

sounds like she's not as interested in you as you are interested in her. even if she did respond, her profile could be fake for all you know...

don't set yourself up for disappointment...move on.
- November 7th, 2009, 07:08 pm
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