jbev is offline jbev Post #1  October 12,2009, 4:54am
jbev's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Oct 2009

Posts: 14

See profile

First post on these boards, hoping to get some advice about this limbo stage I'm currently at with this girl. I had to cut this done greatly due to a limit on these boards...

Been hanging out with this girl I just met recently for the past few weeks. Hit it off pretty good, have long conversations late into the night, helps allot that we are both skydivers, that's how I met this girl. When we are together we would talk for hours. The first night was like 10pm-midnight in my car outside a restaurant.

Second night, we made plans she came to my place to watch a football game but we didn't even watch the game and chit chatted. She stayed till about midnight parted ways.

Third night, I met her outside my home to take her to dinner she gave me this HUGE passionate long hug. Wasn’t expecting that but I’ll take it! After dinner talked for a bit, ended up streaming a movie via Netflix, but when we were watching the movie she wasn't really sitting close to me on the couch she did end up staying the night, told her I just put clean sheets on my bed and she can have my bed and I'll just sleep on the couch. She was perfectly fine sleeping on the couch. Another one of those "long hugs" and went to bed. Woke up in the morning, another "long hug" I went to work and she went home.

That's basically where I am at with her. Now, between these hang out sessions we sometimes text each other back and forth and it's throughout the day practically.

I do have some concerns, 101 in the skydiving world. A single skydiving female is RARE, I’m telling myself why she isn’t with anyone or do I actually have good timing for once in my life. She’s defiantly popular with the guys, I'm pretty sure she has more guy friends then girl friends. Which is fine because that's the way the sport is, male dominated sport. So am "I" just another one of these guy friends?
Should I continue to take it slow, should I try to step it up a little? I was thinking about next time, trying to cuddle with her, see what kind of reaction I get.

Any advice is welcome and greatly appreciative, by the way she's 24 and I'm 30. If that bit of info is worth anything.
 
  Reply With Quote
CapnCrunch23 is offline CapnCrunch23 Post #2  October 12,2009, 5:43am

Unregistered

Joined: Sep 2009

Posts: 1,410

See profile

I wouldn't say you're in limbo..I've learned a new term on this board.. When it comes to dating it's pace not chase.

The opportunity has been there for a little smooching, which from what you posted doesn't seem like you've taking advantage of. As far the movie and being close. She was probably a little nervous. I would definitely try to step it up in that department. Her reaction to that might be a indication of whether or not you're in the friend zone.
I don't see any red flags here at all. Sounds like she is interested but waiting for you to make a move.
Last edited by CaptCrunch23; October 12,2009 at 6:21am. Reason: unless "long hug" means kissing..
 
  Reply With Quote
kevin76 is offline kevin76 Post #3  October 12,2009, 7:01am
kevin76's Avatar

Pacesetter

Joined: Jun 2008

Louisiana

Posts: 447

See profile

CaptCrunch23 wrote :
I wouldn't say you're in limbo..I've learned a new term on this board.. When it comes to dating it's pace not chase.

The opportunity has been there for a little smooching, which from what you posted doesn't seem like you've taking advantage of. As far the movie and being close. She was probably a little nervous. I would definitely try to step it up in that department. Her reaction to that might be a indication of whether or not you're in the friend zone.
I don't see any red flags here at all. Sounds like she is interested but waiting for you to make a move.
Yep. Make your move. If you don't, eventually the chance will pass and you'll get stuck in the friend zone. If she has that many admirers, you're going to have to work at it and make yourself stand out from the rest. Especially since she's a skydiver, I expect she's looking for you to be bold and adventurous and sweep her off her feet. So go for it!
 
  Reply With Quote
jbev is offline jbev Post #4  October 12,2009, 7:12am
jbev's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Oct 2009

Posts: 14

See profile

Thanks for the advice. Yeah, I was thinking I better make a move. I don't want to get stuck in that "friend" zone. I just didn't want to be too over aggressive and send her running away.

Going to try and make plans with her to go for a hike tomorrow. See how that goes!
Last edited by jbev; October 12,2009 at 7:19am.
 
  Reply With Quote
Bootsky is offline Bootsky Post #5  October 12,2009, 10:12am
Bootsky's Avatar

is wishing for good things to happen!

Quick Study

Joined: Sep 2009

NY

Posts: 143

See profile

I would make the move. As a female who has done this many times, she is probably waiting for you to make the move. Some girls are more old fashioned and even if they like a guy, they will not do anything and wait on him. It seems like she likes you and is waiting on you. Go for it Good luck!
 
  Reply With Quote
jayjay is offline jayjay Post #6  October 12,2009, 11:18am
jayjay's Avatar

...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

Sage

Joined: Jun 2008

Brownsville, TX

Posts: 10,932

See profile

I agree with the others for you to 'make a move' already. The long hugs and staying overnight at your place seem like her indirect ways of telling you she wants to be physical with you....she just doesn't want to be the one to directly initiate it. Report back with full details. lol
 
  Reply With Quote
Icouldwriteabook is offline Icouldwriteabook Post #7  October 12,2009, 11:28am
Icouldwriteab…'s Avatar

Enthusiast

Joined: Jan 2009

Denver, Colorado

Posts: 540

See profile

Ditto, make a move. If after 3 dates, a guy hasn't even attempted to kiss me, I start to wonder what is going on.
 
  Reply With Quote
nightling is offline nightling Post #8  October 12,2009, 12:05pm
nightling's Avatar

all I'll leave are smoke rings in the dark.

Power Poster

Joined: Sep 2009

Misery

Posts: 6,939

See profile

She is probably wondering if you like her. But I am just guessing. Only one way to find out for sure.
 
  Reply With Quote
Raw_Truth is offline Raw_Truth Post #9  October 12,2009, 12:52pm
Raw_Truth's Avatar

Veteran

Joined: Nov 2008

Posts: 1,487

See profile

Yeah, you're pretty much at the make-or-break point . If you don't make an overt move on the hike, it's done for.

My personal take given the background she's not interested romantically. Also, should you get rejected may that not create awkwardness in the community you're both a part of? Probably not a lot unlike trying to date a co-worker.
 
  Reply With Quote
jbev is offline jbev Post #10  October 13,2009, 10:25am
jbev's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Oct 2009

Posts: 14

See profile

Raw_Truth wrote :
Also, should you get rejected may that not create awkwardness in the community you're both a part of? Probably not a lot unlike trying to date a co-worker.
Yeah, it's a rather small dropzone. We would see each other all day, when u have your own gear you make it an all day activity, can easily make 6 jumps in one day. I know bunch of crazy people we are hahaha.

The hike isn't going to happen. She has to do a few things but she still is coming over. She actually invited her self over lol. Was hoping for the hike, don't you women like your first kiss to be memorable and all that? Oh well, at least she's still coming over.

Thanks for all the reply's, I'll report back let you all know how it goes.
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply
  • Page 1 of 2
  • 1
  • 2


« Bad Second Date Sort of | Ask a Dating Expert | 25yo Male Virgin »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Topics
Topic Topic Starter Board Replies Last Post
Limbo stage jbev Ask a Dating Expert 7 October 15,2009 8:02am
Stuck at communication stage 3 MQRegan Using eHarmony 15 October 12,2009 10:13am
He said I was cute during the Q/A stage. Braveslady Using eHarmony 20 July 3,2009 7:31pm

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“Does he date women his own age? Who pays? If he still hasn't called by tonight, should you call him? I can understand his read. It doesn't sound like you'll lose any sleep over Bill if you never ... ” –  Carole1520

Join the “My first "Matchmaker" date” discussion

“JNS - the way I handle these sparse/photoless profiles is to Archive them. If there is no photo, you can send a photo nudge. Also, keep an eye on the updates section on your home page. There it will ... ” –  mitchell175

Join the “Sparse profiles.” discussion

“ Thank you for your feedback, Sweetnectar. I've actually stopped the smoking thing because I'm not even sure why I do it when drinking. But I've also stopped receiving matches for now! No other ... ” –  Scott_in_LA

Join the “Profile and Pics Review, Please (M/38)” discussion

“List red flags for men Moderators are watching Get back on topic” –  harnomygirl

Join the “RED flags for men” discussion

“Here's the ad. Want your hair blown back? Trojan Vibrations Commercial Neighbors - YouTube You poor thing! Were you bad? Tweet ... This is the one, though now you did make me have to watch all ... ” –  Shelby

Join the “What kind of add you see on this board?” discussion

“That's the whole point of me posting here instead of saying all this to him. Because I KNOW it's too much. So that's what I'm saying - I am backing off. I'm not pressing. I put the ball in his court ... ” –  Holiday_HH

Join the “I think I blew it...” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 11:25am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0