AnnaSAF is offline AnnaSAF Post #1  October 4,2009, 6:57pm
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Hello all, I just went out on a lovely first date with a guy I've been talking to for about 3 weeks. We had fun and he is everything I'm looking for and more. But I can't help fearing that he may be more into me than I am into him. And I'm kinda wondering if I feel sparks or I'm just forcing myself to feel it because he's so perfect on paper. At first the date was kinda awkward, he was trying to get physically closer and I was trying to keep a nice distance, eventually we got our space issues worked out as we went Bowling first, then we went to Dinner and the conversation was fun, but he tended to talk about a few things that bored me... I brought up new topics to keep the conversation flowing instead of being a monologue lol Then we took a stroll along the water on the way back to our cars and it was romantic, and I let myself get closer to him, and let him hug me, and then eventually kiss me. It was a nice kiss, but I can't help but feel like maybe I went too far too fast or that subconsciously I was just allowing him to get closer because it's been a while since I've been in that sort of situation. How do I figure out whether I actually have romantic feelings for him? I don't want to lead him on or anything. Am I just panicking? lol Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
 
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kyrie717 is offline kyrie717 Post #2  October 4,2009, 7:02pm
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Follow your heart. If you didn't feel the click, don't continue. You will find someone else.
 
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suzyque is offline suzyque Post #3  October 4,2009, 7:17pm
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I was in a very similar situation. My current relationship didn't start out with alot of sparks either. Physically he wasn't everything I was looking for. However, he was one of the kindest, moral, intelligent men I have ever met. Treats me like a queen. I decided to stick it out and sure enough, he has grown on me physically as well.
That is my advice to you. If he is great on paper and treats you wonderful, I would definetely give him a few more dates. He just may grow on you. And, really, what is so bad with him liking you a bit more than you liking him? In my mind, that is a positive.
 
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p_babe is offline p_babe Post #4  October 4,2009, 7:25pm
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Geez, he sounds like he's pushing the speed at which things are going. I'd trust what my (that is your) gut instinct is saying.
 
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DiliG is offline DiliG Post #5  October 4,2009, 7:36pm
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You know ! You don't need to manufacture how you feel - it comes naturally ! Same here, I've done a fair bit of the pre-dating stuff knowing that she may not be my cup of tea but after adequate hang-out time you know when someone is not right for you - physically/emotionally/morally/intellectually or more than one of the above. Go with you how you feel ! (PS - There is time when you settle though......not wanting your ideal partner)
 
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Dugl is offline Dugl Post #6  October 5,2009, 6:56pm
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I realize that people are disposable...but if he "is everything I'm looking for and more", does he at least get a 2nd interview ?
 
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oldkye is offline oldkye Post #7  April 15,2010, 2:34am
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there's a real great song bout this "everything you want" by vertical horizon i believe but this is true with a lot of girls "i didn't see fireworks" I've been watching fireworks on a first kiss and it didn't work out heck the girls i had the most magnetic charge with were the worst and longest painfully drawn out bad relationships I've ever had cause you keep trying for that "spark" you don't have to date guys your not attracted to but a lot of the ones who are good at makeing you see stars as good from practice cause they do it day in and day out and are not the best catch just my two cents
Last edited by oldkye; April 15,2010 at 2:38am.
 
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MicMan is offline MicMan Post #8  April 15,2010, 4:53am
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Poor guy is everything you want and more, but it doesn't sound like he's even going to get to a second date. I guess the grass is always greener.
 
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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #9  April 15,2010, 4:59am
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well considering this is from October 2009....

go with your gut. if its not there, its not there. i never ever ever trust what is "on paper" over chemistry.
 
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insertscreenname is offline insertscreenname Post #10  April 15,2010, 5:02am
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Ack! Just realized Anna probably moved on by now. Or maybe she's married to the guy! LOL!
 
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