booklvr is offline booklvr Post #1  September 6,2009, 7:46am
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I am new to eharmony, had my very first date: we met for a drink. We had loads in common, live in the same neighborhood, had great conversation the date was really fun and ended in a kiss on the cheek....That was two days ago, does the lack of communication mean he's not interested? I know he was headed out of town on business.
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #2  September 6,2009, 7:55am
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It depends..
Did either of you say you'd like to see each other again?
If he was headed out of town for business, that may have meant the day after the date, he was running around getting things ready for the trip...been there and done that.
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #3  September 6,2009, 8:00am
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I preferred to set up a second meeting prior to concluding the first, so I did not feel a need to send a communication afterward, though I usually did. I also usually received a message from the woman. (In my view, if you did not do so in person, you need to send him a “thank you” for the evening.)
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booklvr is offline booklvr Post #4  September 6,2009, 8:12am
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I think D Lion is right....not a good sign. I was soooooo nervous, that I probably didn't seem overly interested in setting up a new date either....He was off to Europe today for ten days....I don't know : (
 
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tjlpd is offline tjlpd Post #5  September 6,2009, 8:25am
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booklvr wrote :
I think D Lion is right....not a good sign. I was soooooo nervous, that I probably didn't seem overly interested in setting up a new date either....He was off to Europe today for ten days....I don't know : (
Don't overthink it. He will call or he won't. I had one who did not call/contact for a week. My EH membership was expiring so I sent him a note saying that and if he wanted to get together again here is my number (I had given it to him before). He did call that day.

If he is on a trip he probably does not have time to call/email etc. I would just see what happens. In the mean time keep looking.
 
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VB_Girl is offline VB_Girl Post #6  September 6,2009, 8:32am
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It's not too late to send a short note to let him know you enjoyed his company and would like to see him again after he gets back from his trip.

Don't stress out about the silence. Since you know he's gone, you shouldn't expect to hear from him.

Good luck!
 
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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #7  September 6,2009, 8:36am
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I wouldnt even worry about it. If he is interested you can be sure that he will call you.
 
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tbesq is offline tbesq Post #8  September 6,2009, 9:01am
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Not everyone is on the same page about how to handle a post first-date. If I enjoyed the woman's company and I knew I was going away for a while, I would tell her this and let her know that I would definitely contact her upon my return to set up another date. To me this makes sense. But not everyone's mind works the same way, so you can't automatically assume you won't hear from him. If you think he's worth a second date, just be patient.
 
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TiffanyDiamond is offline TiffanyDiamond Post #9  September 6,2009, 9:08am
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I wouldn't sweat it. If he is interested he will either find time to call you while he is away (I don't care what anyone says, a quick phone call is not a huge time-suck), or he will call you when he returns. I wouldn't sit around holding my breath though-keep doing what you always do and don't think about it.
 
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ZisaGirl is offline ZisaGirl Post #10  September 6,2009, 10:51am
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I have had guys call me a week or two after a first date. After we've dated for a while, I'd ask why they waited so long. Different answers, ranging from: I didn't want to seem over-eager, I got busy with a work project, I wasn't sure you liked me but decided to give it a try.

I have always been in the "If he likes you, he'll call" camp. But lately, I've changed my feelings a bit, realizing that men need reassurance just as women do.

If I were you, I'd send him a very short, succinct email, something along the lines of: "I just wanted to thank you so much for the ____ (lunch, dinner, whatever he paid for). I enjoyed my meal, and enjoyed the company even more! Hope your trip is going very well."

This gives him 2 things: 1) an email with your name in the subject line, which will be a little jolt for him (think of how you feel when this happens for you!)
and 2) just enough reassurance that you have the social graces to thank someone for taking you for a meal, and that you enjoyed his company.

Lately, I've been doing this, and I've gotten positive responses (immediate emails/phone calls) from every guy. And asked for 2nd dates!

I'd wait until at least you know he has returned home to see if you hear from him. If you do, you know your answer. And if you don't, well, you also know your answer.
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