Justme7 is offline Justme7 Post #1  August 3,2009, 7:08am
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I just reconnected with my high school sweetheart after 30 years. We are both divorced and have children. We see each other about once every three weeks, when he is available and wants to see me. He is still very friendly with his ex-wife and his ex-girlfriend of 11 years (who he was engaged to). I know the ex-girlfriend is still in the picture, although they are not "together" anymore but they have mutual friends and still get together with them. He is very active with his kids and his many friends and hangs out with the boys often. He also has all the boy toys...cars, cycles, boats. Looking at things through my eyes it seems like he can't really commit to anything long term as evidenced by failed marriage, failed engagement and a wealth of "girl" friends in his life.

He calls me almost every day to "check in" and see how i'm doing, but I feel like he does this to keep me in the mix.

I think I know the answer to this question, but I am a fool to think that something more could become of this relationship. It seems to me that I would be wasting my time and probably would never get a monagomous, committed relationship from this person.

What do you think? Any advice?
 
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brneyedangel is offline brneyedangel Post #2  August 3,2009, 10:08am
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would very much appreciate it if the rain would stop, now! Thanks!

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I think you have answered your own question. You knew him then and you see him now. I wouldn't pin my hopes on this man.
 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #3  August 3,2009, 11:12am
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What ever you want to call him:, ladies' man, player, womanizer, he's charming to all the ladies in his life, including you. You can have him, for a while, but you will have to share him with all his other ladies.....
Justme7 wrote :
I just reconnected with my high school sweetheart after 30 years. We are both divorced and have children. We see each other about once every three weeks, when he is available and wants to see me. He is still very friendly with his ex-wife and his ex-girlfriend of 11 years (who he was engaged to). I know the ex-girlfriend is still in the picture, although they are not "together" anymore but they have mutual friends and still get together with them. He is very active with his kids and his many friends and hangs out with the boys often. He also has all the boy toys...cars, cycles, boats. Looking at things through my eyes it seems like he can't really commit to anything long term as evidenced by failed marriage, failed engagement and a wealth of "girl" friends in his life.
He calls me almost every day to "check in" and see how I'm doing, but I feel like he does this to keep me in the mix.
I think I know the answer to this question, but I am a fool to think that something more could become of this relationship. It seems to me that I would be wasting my time and probably would never get a monogamous, committed relationship from this person.
What do you think? Any advice?
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #4  August 3,2009, 11:38am
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[quote=Justme7;697258]
I just reconnected with my high school sweetheart after 30 years. We are both divorced and have children. We see each other about once every three weeks, when he is available and wants to see me. He is still very friendly with his ex-wife and his ex-girlfriend of 11 years (who he was engaged to). I know the ex-girlfriend is still in the picture, although they are not "together" anymore but they have mutual friends and still get together with them. He is very active with his kids and his many friends and hangs out with the boys often. He also has all the boy toys...cars, cycles, boats. Looking at things through my eyes it seems like he can't really commit to anything long term as evidenced by failed marriage, failed engagement and a wealth of "girl" friends in his life.

What do you think? Any advice?



I think any man who can remain on good terms with an ex-wife and ex-fiancee can't be all bad! I see way too many on these threads holding grudges. So it's an art.

I also don't see a divorce as necessarily a "failed marriage". It could be that it had just run its course. My evidence--the "friendly" ex-wife. Neither of them seem to resent the other. Who are we to judge?

Same with the ex-fiancee.

I see nothing in these instances that would lead me to believe he "can't really commit".

That's what I think. Have you ever been married?
 
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islandrain80 is offline islandrain80 Post #5  August 3,2009, 12:08pm
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Justme7 wrote :
I just reconnected with my high school sweetheart after 30 years. We are both divorced and have children. We see each other about once every three weeks, when he is available and wants to see me. He is still very friendly with his ex-wife and his ex-girlfriend of 11 years (who he was engaged to). I know the ex-girlfriend is still in the picture, although they are not "together" anymore but they have mutual friends and still get together with them. He is very active with his kids and his many friends and hangs out with the boys often. He also has all the boy toys...cars, cycles, boats. Looking at things through my eyes it seems like he can't really commit to anything long term as evidenced by failed marriage, failed engagement and a wealth of "girl" friends in his life.
Just one thing: You can't judge someones willingness to commit because they had a failed marriage.
 
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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #6  August 3,2009, 12:13pm
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Justme7 wrote :
We see each other about once every three weeks, when he is available and wants to see me.
this is not good

wrote :
I think I know the answer to this question,
yes

wrote :
but I am a fool to think that something more could become of this relationship.
not a fool, but this man has not met the right woman yet
 
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Icouldwriteabook is offline Icouldwriteabook Post #7  August 3,2009, 5:19pm
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Yep, you know the answer all right! That's all I gotta say.
 
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