hopefulmomof3 is offline hopefulmomof3 Post #1  July 30,2009, 8:18pm
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Started on e harmony after being divorced for a year and a half....met someone who Iam very intrested in, had a great first date talked on a daily basis and then with the plans of getting together again as his idea and sharing many personal things with one another all of a sudden just nothing...no answer to my message and I sent only one waited a few days then sent one more and still no response...wondering what Iam doing wrong?
 
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MCMLXXII is offline MCMLXXII Post #2  July 31,2009, 6:20pm
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Hi Hopefulmom: You shouldn't accept ownership for doing "something wrong" if you know you didn't.

Was there chemistry on the date? Did he seem genuinely interested? Any flirting?

It's easy to hide behind email but how engaging was he in person?
 
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ZisaGirl is offline ZisaGirl Post #3  July 31,2009, 7:12pm
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MCMLXXII wrote :
Hi Hopefulmom: You shouldn't accept ownership for doing "something wrong" if you know you didn't.
Excellent point. You did nothing wrong.

I wrote this on another thread, but I am going through the EXACT same thing now. Met a "great" guy, we had a 4-hour first meeting date. So much chemistry, we clicked immediately, talked so much we didn't realize the place was closing down.

He mentioned several times on the date, getting together again. As soon as I got home, he had already sent me 2 emails, telling me how great of a time he had. I responded with a similar email.

That was Sunday, and as of today, Friday, not a peep from him. But, he has been very active on match (the site where we met), and he just updated his profile on another site.

Who knows why guys do this....some just do.

I'm baffled, hurt, and confused. But, I have 2 other guys I'm communicating with, and although I'm not as excited, I will continue, and so should you.

Do not call/email this man again.

If a man wants to get in touch with a woman, he will find the time. Esp. these days, there are so many ways he can do it very quickly: cell phone, email, text, IM.

He's either just not that into you (if you haven't read it, you should), or he's just busy dating so many, that you were a nice blip on his radar screen.
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #4  August 1,2009, 3:41am
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I'm sorry this happened to you, but sadly this is a large part of dating and what happens when the attraction is one sided. While you really really liked him, he did not quite feel the same way about you. Since you've already contacted him twice and he has not responded, it's time for you to move on because he already has.
 
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IcecreamMoon is offline IcecreamMoon Post #5  August 1,2009, 5:27am
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hopefulmomof3 wrote :
Started on e harmony after being divorced for a year and a half....met someone who Iam very intrested in, had a great first date talked on a daily basis and then with the plans of getting together again as his idea and sharing many personal things with one another all of a sudden just nothing...no answer to my message and I sent only one waited a few days then sent one more and still no response...wondering what Iam doing wrong?

He could have just gotten scared by too much intimacy too soon (or a typical case of a warm heart with cold feet) - men get like that from time to time, even when they are an equal contributor . If this is the case, the best thing is to give it time. But you need to realise that he may or may not come back to you in this time - we simply don't know what he's thinking.

Another possibility is that during your last conversation or in the course of your most recent attempts to contact him, you've accidentally touched on a sensitive nerve ending without realising it. We all have our personal pains and you may have reached his by doing nothing wrong, objectively. The answer to what to do in this case would be the same as above - nothing much. Let it go and see what happens. It is really his responsibility to let you know what's off limits, not yours to guess.

Has that helped in any way or just made it even more unclear?

Basically, what I'm saying is you've done everything you can do under the circumstances. It's time to let him go from your mind and, in time, from your heart. He may never come back, which means he wasn't the right man for you and your relationship simply wan't meant to be. Or he may realise that he's made a mistake and try to correct it. If he comes back to you in time when you are willing to take him back, then he may be yours to keep.

Good Luck!
 
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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #6  August 1,2009, 8:51am
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hopefulmomof3 wrote :
Started on e harmony after being divorced for a year and a half....met someone who Iam very intrested in, had a great first date talked on a daily basis and then with the plans of getting together again as his idea and sharing many personal things with one another all of a sudden just nothing...no answer to my message and I sent only one waited a few days then sent one more and still no response...wondering what Iam doing wrong?
Probably nothing and maybe he decided he isnt interested. I would leave it at that.
 
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