Is he more than just 'flirting' with me?


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oprlvr is offline oprlvr Post #1  July 27,2009, 10:28pm
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I work a PT retail service job and there are two guys (yes, age-appropriate) who have gone overboard to be friendly with me since day one (which is very cool for a new job They are about same age. The one is shift leader and obviously a little shyer and struggles a little at the 'small talk'. The other is a manager and very at-ease sharing humor, talking, etc. The mgr. is definitely not shy about 'happy to see me'. In fact, we have 'flirted' body language a few times (walking very close, him leaning in while talking, his 'dancing eyes', almost touching hands while on the computer, etc) The shy one, however has really gone out of his way (my friends proclaim) to let me know he's trying to flirt: he stands VERY CLOSE (literally glued) when standing behind me, looking right down at me, into my eyes. One time I swear I saw him "gulp". A guy pal told me when a man reacts like this he's thinking only one of two things: how his lips would feel on yours, or the other--not appropriate to share here.

Shy guy has also stood close enough SEVERAL times that we might as well have been in each others arms. One time, I was getting smokes for a customer but picked up the wrong kind. HE literally snatched them from my hand and grabbed the correct pack, literally 'holding' my hand as he gave them to me, then almost 'guided' me back to the
register! As if I'd suddenly lost my way! He lingers around at times, like he wants to say something, but naturally, does not. He has made effort of small talk, such as inquiring about my work schedule, etc. A few nights ago I had a real problem with a register computer and he came over to 'assist'. Well, he stood glued to my backside ( I felt the material of his shirt up against me) as we finalized an order together.

My pals insist he definitely has a 'thing' for me and he's making every effort to flirt. But he's shy and lost at making an actual move. A few days ago, a couple gals came through my lane and I overheard the one tell the other that he is "so and so's bf". That really threw me! When I asked my pals about it they said, "so what". "Relationships end all the time." That obviously shy-guy is trying to make the moves or seriously flirt and let me know he's into me.
What's really going on here?

All feed back very much appreciated!
 
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IcecreamMoon is offline IcecreamMoon Post #2  July 28,2009, 1:56am
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Nothing to see here at all...

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Well, I know what my choice would be, if I were in your situation (the one with the lips and all ).

But the important question IS (all commentary from others aside) who's your choice?
 
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Mr_Right is offline Mr_Right Post #3  July 28,2009, 2:20am
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I agree with Moon. It's decision time.

Or you could ask both of them out separately to do some fun activity (dinner or lunch are too cliched), and see who you like better, and who makes you feel special.
 
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kevin76 is offline kevin76 Post #4  August 27,2009, 8:53am
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Do you really think either of them would act that way if they were not interested?

If you're interested back (in either of them, or both,) do something about it. If not, set some boundaries and keep them! Because what you've described is WAY overboard if there's not mutual interest. They are sending clear signals, next move is up to you.
 
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waypoint_finder is offline waypoint_finder Post #5  August 27,2009, 9:16am

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These guys sound like losers. Apparently they can't meet women any where else so they have to use their position and work place to do so since thats the only place they'll be close to a woman.
 
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boccabum is offline boccabum Post #6  August 27,2009, 9:22am
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waypoint_finder wrote :
These guys sound like losers. Apparently they can't meet women any where else so they have to use their position and work place to do so since thats the only place they'll be close to a woman.
Agree here.
To the OP. My advice (and it's worked for me over the years) NEVER DIP YOUR PEN IN COMPANY INK.
I don't care how meaningless your job may be to you at the time. Don't date people you work with, for, customers, clients, etc. Who cares if they want you?
 
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RebornInFire is offline RebornInFire Post #7  August 27,2009, 9:49am
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boccabum wrote :
Agree here.
To the OP. My advice (and it's worked for me over the years) NEVER DIP YOUR PEN IN COMPANY INK.
I don't care how meaningless your job may be to you at the time. Don't date people you work with, for, customers, clients, etc. Who cares if they want you?
Unfortunately..it's never that cut and dried. It's always best to avoid it, yet I know far too many happy couples that have meet either at work or through their work. Never date a supervisor or someone you supervise, but there are a lot of huge offices out there with different departments where you are insulated. To the OP it sounds like these are supervisors of yours, so they should know better (you should know better). If you are waiting for an invitation, it may never come. They are just doing the typical drooling over the new hot chick at work thing.
 
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boccabum is offline boccabum Post #8  August 27,2009, 9:56am
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RebornInFire wrote :
Unfortunately..it's never that cut and dried. It's always best to avoid it, yet I know far too many happy couples that have meet either at work or through their work. Never date a supervisor or someone you supervise, but there are a lot of huge offices out there with different departments where you are insulated. To the OP it sounds like these are supervisors of yours, so they should know better (you should know better). If you are waiting for an invitation, it may never come. They are just doing the typical drooling over the new hot chick at work thing.
So?
I know of a few people that survived jumping out of a plane without a parachute. It doesn't mean I'm going to try it.
Sorry. Just feeling like arguing.
But I agree. These guys sound just like little kids drooling over the hot new gal. They have no "game" and would never ask her out. And I'll bet she doesn't find them attractive at all because of the goofy way they show their interest. But I bet she likes the attention regardless.
 
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BikerBeagle is offline BikerBeagle Post #9  August 27,2009, 12:30pm
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It's funny how, since you are interested in the attention, it's called "flirting" ...if you weren't, it would be called "sexual harassment".

Honestly, it sounds to me like you are making a mountain out of a mole-hill while these 2 guys are getting their kicks rubbing up against you and leering at your body (I'm assuming this is what 'dancing eyes' means?).

I'm just sayin' ...these guys are your supervisor/manager ...
 
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Mr_Right is offline Mr_Right Post #10  August 27,2009, 5:13pm
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Since it's a month old, I wonder what happened to the OP.
 
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