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keriszoo keriszoo is offline
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Ok. So I like this guy at work. And I think he likes me too. There has been quite a bit of playful flirting or (so I thought) over the last month or so. He came to fix my chair yesterday and was even making sexual inuendos while doing it. So I really took this that he likes me like I do him. So I emailed him later asking him where he dances on the weekends and he never emailed back. I then emailed him asking him if he was ignoring me and again...no reply. So is he blowing me off? I know he doesnt just sit at his desk all day but I am sure he has had a change to read his email since I sent them. My next step was going to be sending him a message on facebook (I have not asked to add him as a friend yet and dont know if I should) since I thought maybe he didnt want to pursue anything through company email or in front of the other girls I work with. So now I dont know do I go on with this next step or do I just sit back and see where he takes this? Any advice?
- July 24th, 2009, 11:38 am
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KiskaKitty KiskaKitty is offline
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Give him more time to reply...being too pushy can be a turn off.

Are there rules at your work about inter-office dating? Some companies look down on it, and he may be following the rules.

Assuming inter-office dating is ok where you work, your best bet is to see how he responds to you in person. Next time you see him, see if he's still flirty with you, or if he gives you the cold shoulder. If he's still flirty you may be better off asking in person if he wants to meet up after work for drinks.

I too have had experience trying to figure out the "flirty" co-worker. Everyone was sure he wanted to go out with me, but we were never more than friends. I think we were both probably a bit scared to take the next step. Good luck!
- July 24th, 2009, 12:10 pm
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j0hn8andy j0hn8andy is online now
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keriszoo wrote :
Ok. So I like this guy at work. And I think he likes me too. There has been quite a bit of playful flirting or (so I thought) over the last month or so. He came to fix my chair yesterday and was even making sexual inuendos while doing it. So I really took this that he likes me like I do him. So I emailed him later asking him where he dances on the weekends and he never emailed back. I then emailed him asking him if he was ignoring me again.and ..no reply. So is he blowing me off? I know he doesnt just sit at his desk all day but I am sure he has had a change to read his email since I sent them. My next step was going to be sending him a message on facebook (I have not asked to add him as a friend yet and dont know if I should) since I thought maybe he didnt want to pursue anything through company email or in front of the other girls I work with. So now I dont know do I go on with this next step or do I just sit back and see where he takes this? Any advice?



Just because a man makes sexual innuendos does not mean he wants a new girlfriend. One should not make that assumption. There could be all sorts of reasons that might occur.

You've eMailed him twice. No reply.

I would just sit back. I'd figure the ball is in his court!
- July 24th, 2009, 12:16 pm
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PoliticalChick01 PoliticalChick01 is offline
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Honestly, you already sent him 2 emails -- which is two too many in my book.

Personally, I have a policy to not date where I work as things could get complicated if things don't work out. Do you really want to go through all that?

Just because he came over to fix your chair and made innuendos doesn't mean that he wants you as a girlfriend. Based upon his comments he more than likely wants a one night stand or a "friends with benefits".

He's more than likely playing games with you, and you are so much better than that.

Move on to someone that will respect you and give you the time and attention you deserve.

Good Luck.
- July 24th, 2009, 12:26 pm
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CJF CJF is offline
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Are these company emails? You would need to be pretty careful about asking private stuff in a non-private email.

I wouldn't send any more. If he is interested in more then flirting, then he will let you know.
- July 24th, 2009, 01:41 pm
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Wow....first rule of thumb is don't date your co-workers. An even bigger rule of thumb is that your office e-mails are not private and can and will be read so don't exchange personal stuff on them. If your company has an anti-dating policy, you both can get fired. Now is not exactly a good time to be losing your job.

You sent two e-mails and got no response. Back off. If he really wants to, he may discretely approach you about getting together for drinks or whatever, but if not, leave him alone.

Finally, a lot of people flirt and a lot of time it means absolutely nothing at all. Be really carefull about reading too much into flirting. You may be right that he likes you and you may be wrong. Also, he may have a very strict personal rule agains dating in the office and may never take his attraction to you anywhere, assuming it exists.
- July 24th, 2009, 02:39 pm
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KungFuFtr KungFuFtr is offline
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If I was in a flirting relationship at work and a coworker had sent me company dating emails, I too would ignore them. I wouldn't want to spend company time on emails like that. Maybe the guy doesn't like dancing...
- July 24th, 2009, 03:37 pm
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angelofmerci angelofmerci is offline
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LOL!! When I clicked on to your profile on EHadvice it came up as being male. Either you made a mistake that no one else here caught or everyone just is making assumptions. Either way do not date where you earn the bread.
- July 24th, 2009, 03:43 pm
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Wiseman2 Wiseman2 is offline
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This is great
angelofmerci wrote :
LOL!! When I clicked on to your profile on EHadvice it came up as being male. Either you made a mistake that no one else here caught or everyone just is making assumptions. Either way do not date where you earn the bread.
- July 24th, 2009, 03:54 pm
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Genie57 Genie57 is offline
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PoliticalChick01 wrote :
Honestly, you already sent him 2 emails -- which is two too many in my book.

Personally, I have a policy to not date where I work as things could get complicated if things don't work out. Do you really want to go through all that?

Just because he came over to fix your chair and made innuendos doesn't mean that he wants you as a girlfriend. Based upon his comments he more than likely wants a one night stand or a "friends with benefits".

He's more than likely playing games with you, and you are so much better than that.

Move on to someone that will respect you and give you the time and attention you deserve.

Good Luck.
Yeah, just because he's flirting with you doesn't mean he's interested in pursuing anything. You really do need to be careful about getting involved with someone on the job. Aside from the fact your company may have rules against it - it is just not a good idea! I would not send him any more e-mail. In fact, I would not even mention it when you do see him. Not a good idea! Plus when you talk about e-mailing him again you sound a little stalkerish. Sorry.
- July 24th, 2009, 04:47 pm
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