What is a guy who "has a lot to offer" a woman?


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oostitch is offline oostitch Post #11  July 5,2009, 4:02pm
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BadAtNickNames wrote :
I always wonder what it means when people say a guy has a lot to offer a woman. I don't have a very exciting life (I don't know how to ski, snowboard, or even skateboard), I don't make or have a lot of money, I'm average-looking at best, and I have zero dating experience. Is it therefore accurate to say I don't have anything to offer a woman?

it can have a different meaning for different people. you will probably never get the same answer twice on that one. what you don't know in extreme sports though you might make up for in honesty and kindness and that can be all a person might be looking for. and you should never think youre not good enough for someone, so dont put yourself down because that may be where your problem is. i hope you find someone who will love you for being you and not for your skydiving expertise! good luck!
 
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soawesome is offline soawesome Post #12  July 6,2009, 1:24pm
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singinggirl wrote :
Are you kind and loving? Are you a good provider? (which doesn't necessarily mean independently wealthy) Are you honest and trustworthy? Will you treat me with respect? Can you make my heart do a little flip-flop when I see you or hear your voice? In essence, are you a good man who will cherish me and who I can cherish? If so, you have a lot to offer.
Singing nailed it!

Besides that most of the guys that say they do all those exciting things are fudging - they've done it once, they dream of doing it, they like reading about it or watching it on tv, they're outright lying. It used to be deal breaker for me if a guy didn't read for pleasure (i love books). I loosened up as i realized we all bring something different to the table and care share and learn from one another. She really got it right re the heart flip flop. I'll overlook a lot if your simple presence "moves me".
 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #13  July 6,2009, 2:33pm
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Has a lot to offer?, You'd be surprised. Women my not want your car, your money, your witty knowledge of everything. Be yourself, and most of all, find a woman you can offer a very lot to..love her madly, find the right one for you, forget the shoppers . You don't have to have some big,impressive super life to make her feel like the most wonderful woman in the world, do you?
BadAtNickNames wrote :
I used to read a lot of books - probably two or three a month. I still read the newspapers everyday. It just seems most women are more interested in a guy who has exciting hobbies than a guy who has a high IQ. And I can hardly blame them! I just want to be more interesting. At my age (31), the few unmarried women who are left are in a hurry to get married, and they don't want to waste their time with someone who they can't imagine spending the rest of their lives with.
 
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brneyedangel is offline brneyedangel — Advice Member-Moderator Post #14  July 6,2009, 2:40pm
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Wiseman2 wrote :
Has a lot to offer?, You'd be surprised. Women my not want your car, your money, your witty knowledge of everything. Be yourself, and most of all, find a woman you can offer a very lot to..love her madly, find the right one for you, forget the shoppers . You don't have to have some big,impressive super life to make her feel like the most wonderful woman in the world, do you?
+1

Great advice
 
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Drexel09 is offline Drexel09 Post #15  July 6,2009, 6:38pm
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BadAtNickNames wrote :
I always wonder what it means when people say a guy has a lot to offer a woman. I don't have a very exciting life (I don't know how to ski, snowboard, or even skateboard), I don't make or have a lot of money, I'm average-looking at best, and I have zero dating experience. Is it therefore accurate to say I don't have anything to offer a woman?
I'll tell ya what buddy, I'm in my early 30's... have a good paying job, very personable, have B+ looks...snowshoe, hike, jog/lift weights read multiple newspapers a day, watch CNBC/MSNBC and should be on Jeopardy. But guess what, I just got let go by my gf of 2 years because I wasn't the one for her. So believe me you can everything or nothing to offer it just depends on finding someone to love you for who you are and nothing else...
 
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wordwoman is offline wordwoman Post #16  July 6,2009, 7:35pm
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BadAtNickNames wrote :
I always wonder what it means when people say a guy has a lot to offer a woman. I don't have a very exciting life (I don't know how to ski, snowboard, or even skateboard), I don't make or have a lot of money, I'm average-looking at best, and I have zero dating experience. Is it therefore accurate to say I don't have anything to offer a woman?
I dated the good-looking, well-built guy who was into skiing, rowing, cycling, running, climbing, sailing, fly-fishing and snowboarding, and he had the income to participate in all of them at a high level. And, I dumped him. Why? Because he couldn't sit still for more than 40 minutes, and his world view was limited by his sports, thus every activity and conversation was around or about his hobbies. It just got old. And, I realized he wasn't really compassionate, patient, kind, generous, considerate, or tolerant of the human frails, differences and flaws that most people possess to one degree or another.
 
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Benevolence32 is offline Benevolence32 Post #17  July 6,2009, 8:42pm
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wordwoman wrote :
And, I realized he wasn't really compassionate, patient, kind, generous, considerate, or tolerant of the human frails, differences and flaws that most people possess to one degree or another.
It should be noted all these things you consider positives are all things you can't tell from an online dating profile. So yeah in essence the OP shouldn't worry about it, but he does have to worry if the women he's interested in are as smart as you and have the clarity to look past or see through all of his peers' profiles that have a load of bs/fluff in them.
Last edited by Benevolence32; July 6,2009 at 8:50pm.
 
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