sara826 is offline sara826 Post #1  May 3,2009, 12:47pm
sara826's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Mar 2009

Posts: 23

See profile



Hi I would like to know how long you should talk to someone before you go and see them, I have been talking on the phone once awwk and emailing just about everyday, since the end of March. I was planing on going to see him sometime in June. I really don't know if I should do this and how long should I be with him the first day. I really do not date this is the frist time since my husband past. we were married 34 years. and its been 5 years since. I rally like this man and I think it is time we meet. Please let me know how people handle long distance dating


Thank you
 
  Reply With Quote
tbesq is offline tbesq Post #2  May 3,2009, 1:33pm
tbesq's Avatar

Virtuoso

Joined: Jun 2008

Posts: 3,536

See profile



Sarah826,


Welcome to the eHarmony discussion boards.


Long-distance dating takes more work than dating someone locally, simply because you're making more of a commitment in trying to make it work. I think that it's important for you to learn as much about that person as is reasonable in the beginning stages, but at the same time you should meet that person as soon as is reasonable to ensure that you will not be making an unnecessary investment of your time. I have a female friend who is corresponding right now with a man from the opposite coast, and it's driving her nuts because she never thinks that she knows enough about him to feel comfortable with meeting him. If he were local, she could just meet him at a public place, a coffee place or a similar place, where she can quickly find out if there is any chemistry. But you can't easily do that if the person is a long ways away.


I think the way you're going about it is smart. You've been corresponding regularly, and you plan to meet him in a few weeks. Let's keep it positive A long-distance match can turn out not to be compatible just as easy as a local match, but I would assume that you think this guy is pretty special if you're willing to try long-distance dating.


I wish you the best of luck.
 
  Reply With Quote
onelasttime is offline onelasttime Post #3  May 3,2009, 2:01pm
onelasttime's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: May 2009

Posts: 2

See profile

sara826, wrote :

Hi I would like to know how long you should talk to someone before you go and see them, I have been talking on the phone once awwk and emailing just about everyday, since the end of March. I was planing on going to see him sometime in June. I really don't know if I should do this and how long should I be with him the first day. I really do not date this is the frist time since my husband past. we were married 34 years. and its been 5 years since. I rally like this man and I think it is time we meet. Please let me know how people handle long distance dating


Thank you
Hi Sara826, I would talk with someone at least 3 weeks. That time frame includes local gentlemen. eHarmony advises the first meeting be one hour and my experience is a little longer. I would say 2 hours and make sure you walk away so that you can go back to your room, car, home or wherever and "regroup". I am also a widow and I was married 37 years. Dating is stressful and it does conjure up some old thoughts related to your spouse initially so that you know this may happen. It happens for widowers as well. Take your time and have fun with this new experience.


Best of Luck
 
  Reply With Quote
pussinboots is offline pussinboots Post #4  May 3,2009, 2:44pm
pussinboots's Avatar

is EXTREMELY happy that the Beatles are now on YouTube

Enthusiast

Joined: Mar 2009

Connecticut

Posts: 510

See profile



sara826, I just posted in Dating's "Long Distance Match Question/Concerns". Rather than repeating myself, I would advise you to read my and the other postings if you haven't already.
 
  Reply With Quote
Mokkesofie is offline Mokkesofie Post #5  May 4,2009, 1:39am
Mokkesofie's Avatar

Power Poster

Joined: Nov 2008

Posts: 8,463

See profile



I was contacted by a man on Match.com and found him very interesting and, despite the distance, wrote him back. The distance between us is 3,719 miles (5,985 km). After e-mailing for nearly 2 months we finally met. We are still "together" after 2 years, seeing one another nearly every month. It takes a lot of e-mailing, phone calls, snail mail, IM'ing and last but not least - traveling. As he's working and I'm not, I do the traveling. Yes, it's damn expensive traveling that often from the UK but he's worth it.
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply


« when do you know when to end a relationship | Ask a Dating Expert | Me or his Cat »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“I did everything. And the repairs where sure expensive. Grr!I paid for them too. :-/” –  LadyVee

Join the “Confusing Man (LONG STORY)” discussion

“I think people change their "type" depending on what they think they need at that point in their lives. It's so subjective that it might be best if we all just let someone else choose a mate for us ... ” –  harnomygirl

Join the “Changing your "type"” discussion

“In the end, aren't we all winners?” –  harnomygirl

Join the “Last Post Wins!” discussion

“4: sex um. both our values hold sex for marriage, so the next best thing to do when you are driven by lust, i guess is making out? If sex equals marriage, then if his goal is to have sex with you, ... ” –  harnomygirl

Join the “Confused~ He likes me or He wants sex?” discussion

“You know, profile writers remind me of junior high school. The kids who came into an exam clueless, and just rambled on and on, hoping that in there somewhere(?) might possibly be something that the ... ” –  harnomygirl

Join the “How much profile do you like to read?” discussion

“Chemical burns when one splashes around in nature are no fun! Tree farming, huh. Tax breaks or love of all things tree... Tax break. (I can make these calls, because I'm on the internetz.) He ... ” –  harnomygirl

Join the “What kind of add you see on this board?” discussion

“The standard method is to eliminate alcohol and bread (and any other gassy carbs) from your diet. You can also try saran wrapping your midsection for a few days. I've heard that works but I haven't ... ” –  harnomygirl

Join the “Belly Fat” discussion

“My boyfriend will be meeting my ex-boyfriend for the first time this weekend so I will let you know how it goes. He almost met him awhile ago so I thought about this before. I told my boyfriend that ... ” –  alethea

Join the “Hold on, hold on, hold on!” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 12:28am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0