I've spent a great deal of time talking to men about the reasons they chose a particular woman for a long-term relationship. They described to me the moment when they first knew a woman was special and had future-wife potential...
real niiiiice... 1/2 the time I'm told by guys they don't see me as 'g/f material' because I'm too nice - go figure.
memo to self - articles are for entertainment purposes only.
You've been hanging out with the wrong types.
I know of couples who are just like those described by the writer. I sent a note to one of them the other day thanking them for being such a wonderful example of marriage to the rest of us.
It doesn't surprise mea lot that men would say this....however, there oftentimes seems to be a difference between qualities that people look for in a new partner...and those they appreciate in someone they've been with for an extended period of time. I have the impression that when people have been in a committed relationship for a while they value qualities such as 'niceness' in their partner more than they do if they're looking for someone new. So while men and women may value qualities such as 'niceness' once they've been in a relationship for a while....they may not value this as much and have other qualities more in mindwhen single and lookingto start a newrelationship.
It doesn't surprise mea lot that men would say this....however, there oftentimes seems to be a difference between qualities that people look for in a new partner...and those they appreciate in someone they've been with for an extended period of time. I have the impression that when people have been in a committed relationship for a while they value qualities such as 'niceness' in their partner more than they do if they're looking for someone new. So while men and women may value qualities such as 'niceness' once they've been in a relationship for a while....they may not value this as much and have other qualities more in mindwhen single and lookingto start a newrelationship.
The tennis ball story is a good analogy, RD, and that's how I interpret "gut feeling" -- a conclusion/sense of something that's a thought, not a feeling; though it will have feelings associated with ... –
Sassafras54
Agree. Given where you are emotionally, I would cease all communication with Mr. Trade Show. You're vulnerable. He's up for a challenge. It's playing with fire. You'll be in a bad place in the ... –
emma_hazards
I have never spoken to a woman like he has.
Yeah, I have never spoken to a woman like that either.
It is a hard call to whether he is just as jerk, or whether he is a player.
Both are feasible ... –
ScottK
Harmonygirl,
I do not usually make up my mind on blanket situations but instead would examine each one on it's own merits, so I cannot answer your question. However, just in the going about of daily ... –
Ephemera
I was ok until the kiss on the cheek part....That doesn't sound like your defenses were up at all...
It's one thing for a guy to walk up and start with the cheesy lines....But as soon as I say, "no ... –
Ingytravel
No. It is not wise.
You have to throw all your eggs into one basket for love to work at all. Relationships are inherently riskier than careers. You can't use the same rules.
You might lose ... –
harnomygirl
Do you have something completely stupid to talk about? Come here. Talk. It's a simple two step process. Please have a good sense of humor about all this. It is good for the heart.
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says "I like two kinds of men: domestic and imported"
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Sometimes...just be a bigger person and take the high road.
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The tennis ball story is a good analogy, RD, and that's how I interpret "gut feeling" -- a conclusion/sense of something that's a thought, not a feeling; though it will have feelings associated with ... – Sassafras54
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Agree. Given where you are emotionally, I would cease all communication with Mr. Trade Show. You're vulnerable. He's up for a challenge. It's playing with fire. You'll be in a bad place in the ... – emma_hazards
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How about phone calls, then? – barbarella_42
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I have never spoken to a woman like he has. Yeah, I have never spoken to a woman like that either. It is a hard call to whether he is just as jerk, or whether he is a player. Both are feasible ... – ScottK
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I have come to this same conclusion. Thank you. – bibittyboo
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Harmonygirl, I do not usually make up my mind on blanket situations but instead would examine each one on it's own merits, so I cannot answer your question. However, just in the going about of daily ... – Ephemera
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I was ok until the kiss on the cheek part....That doesn't sound like your defenses were up at all... It's one thing for a guy to walk up and start with the cheesy lines....But as soon as I say, "no ... – Ingytravel
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No. It is not wise. You have to throw all your eggs into one basket for love to work at all. Relationships are inherently riskier than careers. You can't use the same rules. You might lose ... – harnomygirl
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