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Saw recent posting from a woman, asking "why men all want women with Barbie doll figures"?


This is the type of whine heard frequently from overweight women who aren't succeeding in the dating world. The reality is that most men aren't looking necessarily for "Barbie" type figures; they just don't like fat girls, which seems to be an increasing problem among American women (and men, but to a lesser degree statistically)


To me and I know many other men, it's the biggest dealbreaker in terms of initial attraction to a woman. And it's not just a cosmetic thing; it also speaks volumes about a woman's respect for herself and her body. I admire a person when they can have both strong mind and sound body, as the ancients used to advise. And of course there are serious long-term health consequences of overweight, so it really is a major personal health concern too.


I know there's a movement afoot to "empower fat"--i.e., try to convince the world that being overweight is just fine. If a woman wants to remain fat, that's her prerogative--just don't expect that the male world will then conform to your opinion of what's attractive! And I can tell you many men aren't truthful about these preferences--they just don't call back.


I'm sure this will generate a flurry of responses, mainly from fat chicks, about how OK they are, that I'm superficial for these opinions, beauty is on the inside, etc. etc. Well save your time ladies--no one is saying it's the only thing that's important in a relationship and of course inner attributes ultimately carry the day. But that doesn't get around the point of what initially attracts many men (or repels them!), whether you like that fact or not


So drop the Doritos, and get to the gym!


- January 10th, 2009, 07:54 pm
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i think you said that very well, and speak for all the women who don't really care for fat men.
- January 10th, 2009, 08:15 pm
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Men's desire to be with thinner men is a "preference" that should be respected, such as a woman's desire to date tall men, or racial preferences. But somewhere along the way, some preferences became less acceptable than others. Given that many womenare sensitive about their bodies, and the fact that the dating game, at least inthe initial stages ofdating, is heavily ina woman's favor, her preferences are going to take priority. That's whymen are taught that we should never ask a woman herage or weight, but men should neverexpect reciprocal treatment. Thus, weight discrimination--> bad; height discrimination --> OK.


Ddrrjj, I think this will be an interestingthread (an understatement). However, women are going to take offense to youusing the word "fat." I know, I know,it is a technically accurate description, it'sjust not going to fly over well here and will set a negative tone for the thread.
- January 10th, 2009, 08:25 pm
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ddrjj, wrote :

I know there's a movement afoot to "empower fat"--i.e., try to convince the world that being overweight is just fine. If a woman wants to remain fat, that's her prerogative--just don't expect that the male world will then conform to your opinion of what's attractive! And I can tell you many men aren't truthful about these preferences--they just don't call back.
Whose STUPID idea is that, may I ask? The industry that stuffs corn syrup in just about any processed USA food? You know, some Australian products got banned from being imported into the USA because they contain, shock, horror, FOLIC ACID!!! But it is OK to pump the population full of corn syrup?


My post from here is NOT directed at those who have a DIAGNOSED medical cause for being overweight.


The national health bill from overweight/obese people alone is astonishing. The money could be better spent on education.


The effects of excess weight on internal organs is dramatic.


It isn't about looking good, it is about living, staying ALIVE. Excess weight KILLS.


Some of the many chronic conditions and diseases associated with obesity include:
    [*]Insulin resistance [*]High blood pressure [*]Atherosclerosis [*]Cardiovascular disease [*]Stroke [*]Particular cancers such as breast, endometrial and colon [*]Type 2 diabetes (non-insulin dependent diabetes mellitus) [*]Gall bladder disease [*]Polycystic ovarian syndrome [*]Musculoskeletal problems such as osteoarthritis and back pain [*]Gout [*]Cataracts [*]Stress incontinence [*]Sleep apnoea.[/list]

    Not to mention the reduced libido in many cases, or inability to perform (in the case of men).


    There is NOT ONE good reason to "empower" being unhealthy.


    Stop eating out, take a healthy lunch to work, keep off the lollies, chips, soft drinks and ice-creams (treats allowed once a week in moderation), walk for 60 minutes a day (start at 10 minutes and build up by 5 minutes a day) and the weight WILL come off. Then hit the gym. With the right program, 20 pounds off in 12 weeks is a reasonable target, many would do better.


    Am I "skinny"? FAR from it, and I never will be. I'm an endomorph - I could put on 2 pounds a week no trouble at all as can any other endomorph.Many people have desk jobs and work long hours (and then come home and post on eHA) - if the energy consumed isn't used up with activity, it turns into fat. Simple F= Ein - Eexpended.


- January 10th, 2009, 08:39 pm
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tbesq wrote :

That's whymen are taught that we should never ask a woman herage or weight, but men should neverexpect reciprocal treatment. Thus, weight discrimination--> bad; height discrimination --> OK.
Weight is of itself a very bad indication of size, Tbesq. I do weight training - therefore I am a lot heavier on the scales than my dress size would indicate.


With weight training a woman can easily be 10 pounds (or more)heavier than another woman and be a dress size (or more) smaller than the lighter woman. I believe with men the difference is more marked.


Muscle weighs more than fat - in fact when you first start weight training you put on weight but lose inches.
- January 10th, 2009, 08:46 pm
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Vaire1967 wrote :

i think you said that very well, and speak for all the women who don't really care for fat men.
Nothing worse than a man in the supermarket check-out queue that looks 8 months pregnant.


Also physically it is difficult to make love properly.
- January 10th, 2009, 08:49 pm
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Not sure how relevant it is, but this thread is going to need all the help it can get.

I recently had Australian. Okay, there, my secret is out.

Beef, I mean. Now the grocery store has organic Australian beef (and it was $2/lb less than the US version of the same cut – how the heck does beef get from Australia to the US and cost less, I have no idea?)

If you don’t think we should eat that much corn syrup, wait till you find out how many billions in subsidies we pay to ensure we continue to do so!

- January 10th, 2009, 08:57 pm
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tbesq wrote :


That's whymen are taught that we should never ask a woman herage or weight, but men should neverexpect reciprocal treatment. Thus, weight discrimination--> bad; height discrimination --> OK.


Weight is of itself a very bad indication of size, Tbesq. I do weight training - therefore I am a lot heavier on the scales than my dress size would indicate.


With weight training a woman can easily be 10 pounds (or more)heavier than another woman and be a dress size (or more) smaller than the lighter woman. I believe with men the difference is more marked.


Muscle weighs more than fat - in fact when you first start weight training you put on weight but lose inches.
I understand that, and I think men can see the difference between a bigger woman who's fit and an overweight/obese woman who's not trying to do anything about it. These are the women that men are not attracted to.


Regardless of how it breaks down, weight/body size preferences should be respected, and they aren't.
- January 10th, 2009, 09:01 pm
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D_Lion wrote :

how the heck does beef get from Australia to the US and cost less, I have no idea?

It's the same for produce in Canada - we grow it in our 'backyard', so to speak, but pay less for the crap that gets shipped up from Cali.
- January 10th, 2009, 09:25 pm
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D_Lion wrote :

how the heck does beef get from Australia to the US and cost less, I have no idea?

Oh, there i go using THAT word again - modded.


It's the same for produce that's available in the supermarkets in Canada. We grow it in our figurative backyards, but pay less for the C R A P that's shipped from Cali.
- January 10th, 2009, 09:26 pm
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