Faraday is online now Faraday Post #1  November 25,2011, 6:26am
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I'm not big on the whole giving gifts thing. I give presents to my 3 "besties"... but I never give "friends" (because I feel like people use that term too freely, if they won't bail me out of jail at 4am, they aren't my friend) presents for their birthdays (although, often I will bake them cupcakes or something like that). I give out cookies and homemade jam for holidays. I don't expect gifts ever. So I suck at this

I was invited to a 3oth birthday of a "friend". She's part of my shopping club that meets about 6 times a year. Her party is at an upscale restaurant/lounge, downtown tomorrow night. I'm wondering if I'm obligated to bring a gift. Normally, I just buy the person a drink...but she might not want to get sloshed...we're getting older lol. It's awkward because I don't buy the other girls of my "splurge" club gifts for their birthdays and they're all coming. I'm also wondering if I do buy her a gift, it might be awkward to keep it at the venue and then for her to remember to drag it home at the end of the evening.

Thoughts on etiquette?
 
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Wiseman2 is offline Wiseman2 Post #2  November 25,2011, 9:14am
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Bring extra cash in case "the gift" is everyone chipping in for her share.
Faraday wrote :
I was invited to a 3oth birthday of a "friend". Her party is at an upscale restaurant/lounge
I'm wondering if I'm obligated to bring a gift.
 
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Ingytravel is online now Ingytravel Post #3  November 25,2011, 9:54am
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Since this includes other women that you know from your 'shopping club'....just email or text one of them that you are close to and ask what everyone is doing for gifts if anything...
 
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Faraday is online now Faraday Post #4  November 25,2011, 9:55am
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Wiseman2 wrote :
Bring extra cash in case "the gift" is everyone chipping in for her share.
I just ran into a mutual friend (who is an over-gifter) and she said that was her plan. Sound advice Wiseman, thank you!
 
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harnomygirl is offline harnomygirl Post #5  November 27,2011, 10:48pm
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How did the party go? Were there gifts or not?
 
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Faraday is online now Faraday Post #6  November 28,2011, 8:07am
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harnomygirl wrote :
How did the party go? Were there gifts or not?
It went well I didn't realise this place turned into a club at night! (it's downtown in one of the big shopping centres and normally used for business lunches/dinners) It was so weird being in a club...I haven't done that since I was 18 Almost everyone there was older, but I felt old. I don't dance unless it's with a partner...it felt weird. And I was a little sad because my ex was supposed to go with me to it...and people kept asking where he was.

A few people brought her little gifts (two people gave her jewellery which she ended up wearing), but only her really close friends. I bought her a drink and because of the whole club thing, I'm glad I didn't pick her up anything that she would have had to have carried (because I probably would have bought her wine because I don't know her well).

Thanks for remembering HG You made my morning
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #7  November 28,2011, 5:41pm
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Given your difficulties, I'd bring nothing.

(Had I invited you, and knew your circumstance, I'd do so for your participation in the event and conversation, and not to pocket a trinket.)
 
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Faraday is online now Faraday Post #8  November 28,2011, 7:26pm
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D_Lion wrote :
Given your difficulties, I'd bring nothing.

(Had I invited you, and knew your circumstance, I'd do so for your participation in the event and conversation, and not to pocket a trinket.)
What are my difficulties?
 
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Wiseman2 is offline Wiseman2 Post #9  November 29,2011, 4:55am
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Dating your ex and wanting to move back in with him with your daughter in order to go back to school?
Faraday wrote :
What are my difficulties
Faraday wrote :
And I was a little sad because my ex was supposed to go with me to it...and people kept asking where he was.
 
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Faraday is online now Faraday Post #10  November 29,2011, 5:41am
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Wiseman2 wrote :
Dating your ex and wanting to move back in with him with your daughter in order to go back to school?
Oh! Different ex's! The ex I was going to the party with, I had only been dating for 9 months. And no one else knows about me wanting to go back to school. It would be really hard on my business if people knew I was closing down. I didn't know 90% of the people there and I barely know the birthday girl.
 
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