Are You Stopping Him From Falling For You?

Are You Stopping Him From Falling For You?

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Are You Stopping Him From Falling For You?


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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #1  September 14,2011, 12:11pm
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i like this
 
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HelloKitty2 is offline HelloKitty2 Post #2  September 14,2011, 1:05pm
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Nanette wrote :
i like this
Me, too!
 
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savman is offline savman Post #3  September 14,2011, 1:19pm
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Anyone, male or female, can push too hard and make the other run away. And anyone, male or female, can choose to show so little interest that the other party loses interest.
 
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HelenDanger is offline HelenDanger Post #4  September 14,2011, 2:15pm
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True Savman. But with current dating roles, even the ultra modern ones, interest is shown in slightly different ways according to gender.
Last edited by HelenDanger; September 14,2011 at 2:18pm.
 
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savman is offline savman Post #5  September 14,2011, 3:58pm
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HelenDanger wrote :
True Savman. But with current dating roles, even the ultra modern ones, interest is shown in slightly different ways according to gender.
I agree Helen, but I think sometimes this is overdone. And over interest and under interest can be shown from both sides, under pretty much any dating rules.
 
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CurbedMyEnthusiasm is offline CurbedMyEnthusiasm Post #6  September 14,2011, 4:33pm
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savman wrote :
I agree Helen, but I think sometimes this is overdone. And over interest and under interest can be shown from both sides, under pretty much any dating rules.
+1. The article makes some good points, but I can see it being easily misinterpreted. Obviously don't smother the guy which will push him away, but they almost seem to be promoting a purely passive role which I disagree with.

There's a fairly fine line between being chased and aloof, and also between giving space and actively contributing to develop a "rhythm" in the relationship.
 
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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #7  September 14,2011, 5:12pm
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mmm its usually men that live in the femmy place that would act like that

article directed at women... women are the ones that characteristically act like this
 
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maffif is offline maffif Post #8  September 14,2011, 5:54pm
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CurbedMyEnthusiasm wrote :
+1. The article makes some good points, but I can see it being easily misinterpreted. Obviously don't smother the guy which will push him away, but they almost seem to be promoting a purely passive role which I disagree with.

There's a fairly fine line between being chased and aloof, and also between giving space and actively contributing to develop a "rhythm" in the relationship.
I agree with this. I do think there is a fine line between what the author is saying to do by remaining aloof to allow the guy to do the chasing. Too little interest could backfire...

It would be nice if we could all just be ourselves and not worry about what is too much and what isn't.
 
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savman is offline savman Post #9  September 14,2011, 6:06pm
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maffif wrote :
It would be nice if we could all just be ourselves and not worry about what is too much and what isn't.
Yes x100
 
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LDJ is offline LDJ Post #10  September 14,2011, 6:54pm
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There is a difference between "allowing the guy to do the chasing" and then offering no positive reinforcement for his efforts vs "allowing the guy to do the chasing" and remaining unrepsonsive or aloof.

No guy is going to chase if he never gets the message that she is enjoying the game of tag. It is a subtle but important difference that separates showing interest from not showing interest.

But I think it is a mistake women make if they think that guys like to be shown approval in the same way we women like to be shown approval. The genders are vastly different in this way.
 
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