Odira is offline Odira Post #1  July 22,2011, 5:16am
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So my brief flirtation with online dating ended a couple of months ago, and was as spectacularly unsuccessful as I had feared it would be. I’m sure the lion’s share of the blame for that rests with me. I’m not sure what my motivation was when I joined up – guessing I looked at my age and figured it would be my last best chance. Having been happily single and unattached for a long time, I really wasn’t looking for a long-term relationship, so I’m sure that colored my thinking.

What I have learned both from my failure to connect with someone as well as the information I have gathered from these Advice Boards is the following:

1. My age (54), my appearance (5) and my weight (5’7” 140 lbs) make me an unattractive option for most men.

2. My scintillating personality, which I always considered to be my strong suit, turns out to be another huge nail in my relationship coffin. I am strong-willed, independent, financially secure, and live a life driven by logic and not by emotion. Evidently that translates into ‘masculine’ which is also unappealing to men.

The conclusion I’ve drawn from the evidence is that I am destined to remain single. I don’t find that particularly depressing, as I wasn’t looking to change my martial/relationship status. It would have been nice to have found a kindred spirit, however. So I’ll be signing off.

I do hope you all find what you are looking for. I’ve learned there are lots of people out there seeking companionship and love and I wish you the best.
 
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BabyYoda is offline BabyYoda Post #2  July 22,2011, 5:53am
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Odira wrote :
So my brief flirtation with online dating ended a couple of months ago, and was as spectacularly unsuccessful as I had feared it would be. I’m sure the lion’s share of the blame for that rests with me. I’m not sure what my motivation was when I joined up – guessing I looked at my age and figured it would be my last best chance. Having been happily single and unattached for a long time, I really wasn’t looking for a long-term relationship, so I’m sure that colored my thinking.

What I have learned both from my failure to connect with someone as well as the information I have gathered from these Advice Boards is the following:

1. My age (54), my appearance (5) and my weight (5’7” 140 lbs) make me an unattractive option for most men.

2. My scintillating personality, which I always considered to be my strong suit, turns out to be another huge nail in my relationship coffin. I am strong-willed, independent, financially secure, and live a life driven by logic and not by emotion. Evidently that translates into ‘masculine’ which is also unappealing to men.

The conclusion I’ve drawn from the evidence is that I am destined to remain single. I don’t find that particularly depressing, as I wasn’t looking to change my martial/relationship status. It would have been nice to have found a kindred spirit, however. So I’ll be signing off.

I do hope you all find what you are looking for. I’ve learned there are lots of people out there seeking companionship and love and I wish you the best.

Have you decided to give up on meeting men forever? To be honest, your post read like a suicide letter.

We all have had struggles finding mates. Granted, your age and personality may be contributing factors in your difficulty to find a mate, but your geographical location mayy also play a part in it as well. Lastly, I am not sure if you did everything you could in order to meet someone. You still have the option to meet people IRL. Since you are fiancially secure, what's stopping you from taking a nice vacation and possibly meetng someone while on vacation? You can also relocate or by property in other areas which may increase your chance of meeting someone.

I do understand if you have decided to take a break from online dating. I just hope you haven't given up in dating men period. Oh, you are not alone with having difficulty meeting people. Since you are a frequent member of this board, you have read quite a few threads and posts from people of various backgrounds sharing testimony about their online dating experiences.

Whatever you feel is best for you is something I think you should do and if that means taking a break from online dating, then so be it. It is your life and your choice. I wish you the best of luck.

B.Y.
 
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HelenDanger is offline HelenDanger Post #3  July 22,2011, 9:38am
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Wow. I'm really sorry to hear this. I don't know you and maybe it's my imagination, but I read some hurt feelings in your very well written post. And that makes me sad. I'm sorry you've been made to feel unattractive physically or in your communication style. I haven't picked up on anything that would make me think that about you.

There's no such thing as a last chance when the door's still open. But I also respect that you know what is best for yourself and I wish you all the best and support you doing what you need to do. Your ideas are still valuable regardless of dating status, though, so I hope you'll consider contributing some of them to the conversation in the forums when you think appropriate.
 
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OlderButWiser0549 is online now OlderButWiser0549 Post #4  July 22,2011, 10:29am
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Sorry to hear that, Odira. I've enjoyed reading your posts here. You're not REALLY going to leave us, are you?
 
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