My soul winced: B.Y.'s confessions Part. 1

Nevertheless, I have decided to give the latter person the benefit of being a female. It is just that she was really hard on the eyes. And for me to play her game and looking like she did kind of ticked me off. lol Yeah, I knee jerk reacted and disabled my profile/account for a few days, but I was just frustrated because I don't really fair well on that site to boot and when someone does express interest, it happened to be those individuals. However, I don't consider any of them to be bad/horrible people. I think that they will make someone a wonderful companion one day.

B.Y.

Ahhhhhhh...you seem to have met a 'Wendy Williams' type...lol

However, you say you're not sure if the women you spoke about in your OP were or were not TG's. With that said, I have been accused of having masculine legs and a masculine-like body when I was into my over-fitness phase...and unfortunately my legs and arms have sorta stayed in athletic mode even after I discontinued the jogging/free-weights/swimming junkie phase I was into up until three years ago.

Men can't tell by looking at my pic, but when they meet me on a first date I always get the "Whoaaaaa lady...you been baling hay and pushing/lifting farm equipment all your life?????"....it is what it is

But, I do not think it is necessary to post a person's 'new gender' status in a profile (a huge TMI ...IMVHO). But I can see your dilemma and agree with you that a transgender person should be forthcoming within the first phone call, because even if they see themselves as the 'new' gender, they are being deceitful if a prospective date has a problem with their 'new' gender status and still views it as uncomforatble or a 'can't do'...not to mention the added deceit for folks seeking long term relationship that hopefully develops into marriage and most definitely having children.

I live in NYC and have seen some beautiful transgender women (and very successful TG men)...and have friends who have unwittingly dated and got very serious with a TG person...but it always ends badly when the TG is dishonest because he/she expects the unwitting party to give up hopes for children of their own in the natural childbearing way, or expects the unwitting person to overlook their preferences and love him/her anyway.

But dishonesty abounds on online dating sites...what with folks running around being cagey about height, weight, income, employment, etc.

As another poster stated, it is the nature of the beast.

BTW: I have been reading your threads since you began as an eha member and you appear to be a straight-shooter...a refreshing trait, indeed. I sincerely wish you well in your all of your dating travels...

Ahhhhhhh...you seem to have met a 'Wendy Williams' type...lol

However, you say you're not sure if the women you spoke about in your OP were or were not TG's. With that said, I have been accused of having masculine legs and a masculine-like body when I was into my over-fitness phase...and unfortunately my legs and arms have sorta stayed in athletic mode even after I discontinued the jogging/free-weights/swimming junkie phase I was into up until three years ago.

Men can't tell by looking at my pic, but when they meet me on a first date I always get the "Whoaaaaa lady...you been baling hay and pushing/lifting farm equipment all your life?????"....it is what it is

But, I do not think it is necessary to post a person's 'new gender' status in a profile (a huge TMI ...IMVHO). But I can see your dilemma and agree with you that a transgender person should be forthcoming within the first phone call, because even if they see themselves as the 'new' gender, they are being deceitful if a prospective date has a problem with their 'new' gender status and still views it as uncomforatble or a 'can't do'...not to mention the added deceit for folks seeking long term relationship that hopefully develops into marriage and most definitely having children.

I live in NYC and have seen some beautiful transgender women (and very successful TG men)...and have friends who have unwittingly dated and got very serious with a TG person...but it always ends badly when the TG is dishonest because he/she expects the unwitting party to give up hopes for children of their own in the natural childbearing way, or expects the unwitting person to overlook their preferences and love him/her anyway.

But dishonesty abounds on online dating sites...what with folks running around being cagey about height, weight, income, employment, etc.

As another poster stated, it is the nature of the beast.

BTW: I have been reading your threads since you began as an eha member and you appear to be a straight-shooter...a refreshing trait, indeed. I sincerely wish you well in your all of your dating travels...

That is why I won't use free weights, no matter what trainers suggest. I can build muscle pretty easily (not enough for competition, just enough to freak some people out) and so I don't do it. I try to make everything aerobic instead. I want to look as feminine as possible. I think women who do use weights are skirting a thin line and this post about men who wonder about tgs just made me positive that I will never lift anything heavy repeatedly for any reason whatsoever. I can see why men might wonder about gender if women get buff, and I can see why some women do it anyway, since it probably feels good. It's just not worth it to me. If you have a propensity for muscle it can make staying toned easier, even when you don't have the energy for real exercise. Overall, it seems to make more sense to display skeletal mass rather than muscle mass if you don't want to be alone forever.

I am sure BY will find someone eventually. He doesn't seem to be easily discouraged.

I am sure BY will find someone eventually. He doesn't seem to be easily discouraged.

Great post! I appreciate you taking the time to express your opinion of the matter. To be honest, this issue is dead and has been dead since I wrote it. One reason why I decided to share this story to illustrate to some people that I am indeed a human being that goes through the same emotions as themselves. Sometimes, I get the feeling that people here don't view me as human as themselves nor respect me as such. However, it is par for the course for I know understand certain things.

Lastly, I am real. I have no choice in the matter. My parents have always been real with me, the people who are the closest to me have been real with me, so this approach is my comfort zone and helps me survive. I been through too much and continue to go through too much. With little to no support other than a very few people, I am left on my own to figure things out. This is why I am one of the few people here who don't seek advice. Anyways, it's cool. No hard feelings towards those individuals who I briefly corresponded with and now it's time to keep it moving.

B.Y.