Decisiveness: How important is it to you?


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BabyYoda is offline BabyYoda Post #1  July 18,2011, 4:42pm
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Last week, I was listening to a podcast by this guy that I am a fan and supporter of and he touched on this topic that resonated in my mind. Actually, it has been something I have always thought about, but I was glad someone else brought it up and discussed in detail.

I think one of my biggest pet peeves about online dating is that I have ran into quite a few individuals who were indecisive(either with me and/or online dating in general) and it can be quite taxing.

So, I am curious in knowing if being decisive is important to you? If so, why? If not, why not?

B.Y.
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #2  July 18,2011, 4:59pm
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I'm not sure how important it is...
 
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harnomygirl is offline harnomygirl Post #3  July 18,2011, 5:02pm
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TheThinker wrote :
I'm not sure how important it is...
 
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harnomygirl is offline harnomygirl Post #4  July 18,2011, 5:07pm
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Decisiveness is very important to me. If he isn't decisive I tend to resent it because then I have to take over and I don't like that. Even if he asks for my opinion, I'd like him to agree definitively or not. If he's worried about an argument because it happens to be something I am passionate about then he loses many points on my attractiveness scale. I think I am typical in preferring someone who can make a decision whenever one is called for, just as I do.
 
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tinaroonie is offline tinaroonie Post #5  July 18,2011, 5:43pm
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I like a guy who is decisive, can take charge, and know what he wants. I agree with harmonygirl that even if he wants to know my opinion, or take that into consideration, he shouldn't pawn it all off on me. I don't like a guy who is as my boyfriend put it, "a Minnie Me" meaning that no matter what he suggests, the other person agrees 100% of the time. They should have their own opinions.

I like a little give and take in a relationship. I want to sometimes plan stuff, and sometimes let my boyfriend plan, and sometimes we decide together and make compromises on stuff.

At some point someone has to make a final decision about stuff, and I don't want a guy where the conversation would degenerate to "You decide" - "no, you decide" - "no you", etc, etc.

So yes, decisiveness is important to me, although I can think of situations where I can be indecisive, however in those situations I can at least say what I don't want, and narrow it down that way to a decision in the end.

One last thought, I don't want someone who always makes the decisions, and always has the last word with things, that's more than being decisive, that's overbearing.
 
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LDJ is offline LDJ Post #6  July 18,2011, 5:44pm
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Decisiveness is very sexy, it shows courage, self confidence, conviction, a willingness to take charge and take the heat if it doesn't work out.
 
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BabyYoda is offline BabyYoda Post #7  July 18,2011, 5:47pm
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TheThinker wrote :
I'm not sure how important it is...
^^Being indecisive.. Btw, I "get it" Fyi..

B.Y.
 
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BabyYoda is offline BabyYoda Post #8  July 18,2011, 5:50pm
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harnomygirl wrote :
Decisiveness is very important to me. If he isn't decisive I tend to resent it because then I have to take over and I don't like that. Even if he asks for my opinion, I'd like him to agree definitively or not. If he's worried about an argument because it happens to be something I am passionate about then he loses many points on my attractiveness scale. I think I am typical in preferring someone who can make a decision whenever one is called for, just as I do.
Good points. But, I think that a couple who have great communication skills will not have to worry about having problems with agreeing to disagree. People can have constructive discussions about various topics without it blowing up to a heated debate.

I also like someone who is able to make decisions. It isn't about making one with me or for me, but for herself. I like women who is dedicated towards having a successful romantic life and is wiling to put forth the effort necessary to accomplish said goal. Even if that goal doesn't include me, then make the decision to not include me and move on.

B.Y.
 
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BabyYoda is offline BabyYoda Post #9  July 18,2011, 5:51pm
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tinaroonie wrote :
I like a guy who is decisive, can take charge, and know what he wants. I agree with harmonygirl that even if he wants to know my opinion, or take that into consideration, he shouldn't pawn it all off on me. I don't like a guy who is as my boyfriend put it, "a Minnie Me" meaning that no matter what he suggests, the other person agrees 100% of the time. They should have their own opinions.

I like a little give and take in a relationship. I want to sometimes plan stuff, and sometimes let my boyfriend plan, and sometimes we decide together and make compromises on stuff.

At some point someone has to make a final decision about stuff, and I don't want a guy where the conversation would degenerate to "You decide" - "no, you decide" - "no you", etc, etc.

So yes, decisiveness is important to me, although I can think of situations where I can be indecisive, however in those situations I can at least say what I don't want, and narrow it down that way to a decision in the end.

One last thought, I don't want someone who always makes the decisions, and always has the last word with things, that's more than being decisive, that's overbearing.
Great points!

B.Y.
 
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BabyYoda is offline BabyYoda Post #10  July 18,2011, 5:52pm
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LDJ wrote :
Decisiveness is very sexy, it shows courage, self confidence, conviction, a willingness to take charge and take the heat if it doesn't work out.
^^Sexy response!

B.Y.
 
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