Define a successful relationship


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Special-K is offline Special-K Post #1  July 10,2011, 12:57pm
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So, I've been doing a lot of thinking about what defines a successful relationship.

Must a successful relationship result in marriage? And if it ends in divorce, was it unsuccessful? Is it two people sharing 50 years together, even if they never married? Or 10+ years married or not? Could it be as simple as learning something about yourself regardless of the time spent together? Is it making it through dinner w/o stabbing your partner w/ a steak knife?*

How would you define a successful relationship? Have you ever had one?

*No steak knives (or partners) were harmed in the making of this thread...
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #2  July 10,2011, 1:14pm
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Q: Was it good for you too?

A: Yes!
 
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sassygrrl101 is offline sassygrrl101 Post #3  July 10,2011, 2:26pm
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Great question! I would think the answer is going to be different for everyone. I personally don't think a successful relationship must end in marriage. However, I was married once and divorced, and have had far better relationships than that that didn't pan out. I think we all learn something, gain some experience in all the relationships we've been in. But, to me, a truly successful relationship is one that lasts. If not, I would consider it unsuccessful, but none-the-less, a learning/growing process.
 
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KikiAZ is online now KikiAZ Post #4  July 10,2011, 2:33pm
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I also don't think getting married is the goal, therefore it doesn't define success. I don't think divorce is necessarily failure either.

This is a toughie...and one I have contemplated before.

Success probably means, to me, a long term loving relationship with a man where our lives were intertwined and where most days we were happy and passionate about each other and our lives in general and where no significant underlying negative activity (known or secretive) was ocurring.
 
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paintandbooks is offline paintandbooks Post #5  July 10,2011, 3:19pm
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If both parties believe a relationship is a success, then it is, isn't it???
 
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grimmreapha is offline grimmreapha Post #6  July 10,2011, 3:54pm
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I personally believe a successful relationship is one based on trust and free communication. With those 2 factors a relationship will last a long time(which i feel is successful in a world filled with short attention spans). Now that may end in marriage or end when death does you part, but ultimately a successful relationship by any means.. LoL, that's just me..
 
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shapeShifter79 is offline shapeShifter79 Post #7  July 10,2011, 4:15pm
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KikiAZ wrote :
I also don't think getting married is the goal, therefore it doesn't define success. I don't think divorce is necessarily failure either.

This is a toughie...and one I have contemplated before.

Success probably means, to me, a long term loving relationship with a man where our lives were intertwined and where most days we were happy and passionate about each other and our lives in general and where no significant underlying negative activity (known or secretive) was ocurring.
+1 Kiki's explanation. I don't look back on all my past (ended) relationships as failures. More good than bad is good enough.
 
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szgorzelski is offline szgorzelski Post #8  July 10,2011, 8:59pm
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I'm divorced and I think I had a successful relationship with my ex-wife. She probably doesn't agree, ha ha, but we're still friendly and made two great little girls. Some people need to be married to feel successful. It's all relative.
 
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TiffanyDiamond is offline TiffanyDiamond Post #9  July 11,2011, 6:38pm
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I think that is a great question! I have been asking myself that exact question recently. I have been in a great relationship for a little over a year now - the first one in a very, very, very long time. It's been so good that it's sometimes scary - like it's not real. Even though marriage is not necessarily the ultimate goal - I was wondering how I would feel if it ever ended. I know I would be extremely sad. I think that this has actually been the best relationship I've ever been in. Neither one of us is perfect and we do have our issues like every other couple. But I love the way we take care of each other and we resolve our issues and just move on.

Anyway, at first I thought that for me if it ended then I would consider that it was not a successful relationship. But upon second thought - I could say that I learned something from it. I didn't really think that I would be able to love a man again unconditionally after my marriage. I love doing things for him and I love his protective nature. And he is just a generous, caring person with everyone. So I guess I could say that anytime you have someone in your life that makes your life better, even if it's for a short time, that that was a successful relationship.
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #10  July 11,2011, 7:51pm
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Special-K wrote :
How would you define a successful relationship? Have you ever had one?
So long as the two involved are happy...that's good enough for me.

Whether we married or not...all of mine have been good; I would not be there otherwise.

Even my divorce...we got out before we brought out the worst in each other. We ended on good terms, wishing each other well...

...just about as good as it can get, as far as divorces go.

j8a
 
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