If someone always thinks of themselves as the "victim"...


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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #1  February 13,2011, 2:09pm
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What does that make the rest of us?

Evil minions of some larger, dark force that is conspiring against them?
 
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Dropdeadredtx is offline Dropdeadredtx Post #2  February 13,2011, 2:25pm
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Yes. I am an evil minion. There. I said it.
 
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Xable is offline Xable Post #3  February 13,2011, 2:44pm
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Are you saying there are not people are there who mistreat other people? Is it not possible that someone fell "victim" to one of these people?

I don't think people who always think of themselves as "victims" necessarily think everyone else is evil (if they did, they'd lock themselves away and stop trying). Maybe they really have had a run of bad luck running into a string of not so nice people.
 
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Dropdeadredtx is offline Dropdeadredtx Post #4  February 13,2011, 2:46pm
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I think she is referring to those who are 'perpetual victims', who never take any responsibility for their own lives and choices, misfortune is always someone else's fault. We see quite a few of those around here!
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #5  February 13,2011, 3:45pm
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Definitely what Red said. There are people who have been truly hurt by others. But, there are many who claim that what happens to them is always someone else's fault. From their flat tire to bounced checks to unwise hair color choice.
 
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Sparkles56 is offline Sparkles56 Post #6  February 13,2011, 4:06pm
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AndieIsMe wrote :
Evil minions of some larger, dark force that is conspiring against them?
Smoking a cigar is so much more enjoyable when I'm plotting evil against some unsuspecting "victim"... and I mean "victim" as it's used here...
 
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Dropdeadredtx is offline Dropdeadredtx Post #7  February 13,2011, 4:14pm
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Sparkles56 wrote :
Smoking a cigar is so much more enjoyable when I'm plotting evil against some unsuspecting "victim"... and I mean "victim" as it's used here...
Maybe I should take up cigars as part of my 'evil minion-ness'....
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #8  February 13,2011, 4:24pm
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Cigarellos. I think they are called in Europe. My parents went there and my mom came back with these "mini cigar" things. They were kinda cool looking. Same color and odor as a cigar, a little larger than the average cigarette, but you smoked it like a regular cigarette.

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Adding to the question, kinda. Do you find that these people who consider themselves the victims of the world are also the ones who find reasons to do others harm as a way to get back at them?
 
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Sparkles56 is offline Sparkles56 Post #9  February 13,2011, 4:29pm
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AndieIsMe wrote :
Adding to the question, kinda. Do you find that these people who consider themselves the victims of the world are also the ones who find reasons to do others harm as a way to get back at them?
Possibly. But those with a "victim" mentality cause a metric ship-ton of collateral damage when things go south for them. And they refuse to clean up the mess.

"Victim Mentality" is one of my Can't Stands.
 
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singinggirl is offline singinggirl Post #10  February 13,2011, 7:09pm
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Interesting question, Andie. I have a friend who is a perpetual victim--nothing has ever been her fault in her entire life. I love her, but it's infuriating. Her husband left her because he was a jerk and it had nothing to do with the affair she had. Her oldest son quit speaking to her for a time because he was so mad, but she decided it was because her ex poisoned his mind against her.

I don't really see her trying to do things to get back at other people, usually.

She also tries to convince me that every bad or unpleasant thing that happens to me is because people are just out to get you. I counter with the logic behind it, but I don't really think you can change that way of thinking in a person. It always makes me wonder where it comes from--if it's a learned response or innate.
 
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