How do you think you make other people feel?


Reply
 
Topic Tools Search this Thread
eHA_Admin_Lori is offline eHA_Admin_Lori — Advice Official Moderator Post #1  February 11,2011, 5:17pm
eHA_Admin_Lor…'s Avatar

My one wish for you, is love. :)

Moderator

Joined: Nov 2008

Santa Monica, CA

Posts: 5,120

See profile

Poet/activist Maya Angelou said:

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you make them feel."

Do you think this is true?

How do you think YOU make other people feel?
 
  Reply With Quote
lunabeach is offline lunabeach Post #2  February 11,2011, 5:36pm
lunabeach's Avatar

Veteran

Joined: Jun 2010

Ohio

Posts: 2,167

See profile

I think that's very true - there are two people in particular who I really love to be around. Actually, a lot of people like to be around them. One is funny - just exudes life. The other is warm - being around her is calming, peaceful, stable. They're extreme examples and very charismatic people, but I can think of quite a few people in my circle that I enjoy just because of what it feels like to spend time with them.

I'm not sure how I make other people feel...I've been told I'm too nice to yell at. As a first impression, that I look friendly. Friends have said that I made them feel comfortable/welcome...no one is a stranger for very long. Most of my close relationships have a lot of humor and are rather peaceful (low drama/low conflict); I'm sure a lot of that comes from how I interact with people.
 
  Reply With Quote
j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #3  February 12,2011, 8:33pm
j0hn8andy's Avatar

.....yes, she.....Sweeps past softly, without a sigh.....

Power Poster

Joined: Jun 2009

California

Posts: 5,091

See profile

I bring Optimism to the table. It's about the best thing I do, and I do it well.

I like to bring out the best in people...use whatever is unique about them to show them how special they are. It's important to me that people feel at ease around me, and are comfortable. I use humor to achieve that aim. I make sure they know I listen; I want people coming back.

People tell me I lift their spirits...and that I'm fun.

j8a
 
  Reply With Quote
dazedconfuzed is offline dazedconfuzed Post #4  February 12,2011, 8:42pm
dazedconfuzed's Avatar

and I see your true colors shining through...

Board Leader - Chit-Chat

Joined: Mar 2010

Wonderland

Posts: 540

See profile

Yes, I believe it's true. I can look back on a lot of relationships, friends/lovers/family and remember the feeling of something that happened more than what was said. It's the feelings that can bring a smile to my face, or a tear to my eye.

I asked my best friends this question.
They all said the same thing. They feel loved and appreciated by me. I make them laugh and feel good and that they can always count on me to be a shoulder to cry on because I always try to look for the best in every situation for them.

I am sure there have been instances where this might not have been so, but in general, I make sure the people I care about know how much they mean to me, that I am thinking of them, even if it's just a text message to say hi because I know how it feels to know someone is thinking of them, or me.
 
  Reply With Quote
tinaroonie is offline tinaroonie Post #5  February 13,2011, 6:39am
tinaroonie's Avatar

Enthusiast

Joined: Nov 2010

Posts: 585

See profile

I think this is true. I think back about past relationships, and say now in hindsight, I felt good about myself when I was with this guy, or I felt bad about myself, was always second guessing myself when I was with this other guy. I can remember feeling truly happy at times, and truly sad at other times, based on how a person or situation made me feel.

I hope it's the same way with my friends and family, that I make them feel good, that I am someone they want to be around because of that. I have found that if I am with someone who is unhappy, angry, or whatever, they tend to pull me down with them, so I try to surround myself with uplifting people. And I try to be that uplifting spirit when I am with other people.

My boyfriend has said he used to be an angry person, bitter about his upbringing, and he took out that anger where it didn't belong. He has since moved on from that, took out the anger where it did belong, and moved on. Now he surrounds himself with positive people, happy, uplifting people; I like to think I am one of them. I tend to see life positively.

Emotions to me stand out much more clearly than other things (though I have a good memory to remember events and little details in them), but how I felt is something that I will never lose.
 
  Reply With Quote
Special-K is offline Special-K Post #6  February 13,2011, 7:24am
Special-K's Avatar

is happier than if it was a 'no boss Friday' going into a three-day weekend... :-)

Veteran

Joined: Aug 2010

Posts: 1,867

See profile

I totally agree w/ this statement! I'm not sure how I make people feel... probably depends on who it is, how I feel about him or her, how that person fits in my life and what we're doing. Regardless, I hope that whatever feeling I leave w/ someone it's not a negative feeling.

I have also been told that, in dating, it's not all about what you look like, who you are, what you have or what you do, but how you make the other person feel about him-/herself that draws a person to you. Which begs the question (if this is true) why are we so drawn to people who make us feel unworthy?

I mean, and many of you will argue, reading these boards and IRL (men and women alike... I too have been guilty of this) whine over how someone is mistreating them and want to know how to win back the object of his/her desire (the one making them feel unworthy and sad). Think about your own dating history. Is your heart scarred by those you liked/loved who treated you well... or by the ones who ripped out your heart, stomped on it and left you for dead?...

So, what does that say about us? Are we all masochists?
 
  Reply With Quote
Sassafras54 is online now Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #7  February 13,2011, 10:59am
Sassafras54's Avatar

Your Community Coordinator

Moderator

Joined: Oct 2009

San Pedro, CA

Posts: 9,064

See profile

I think it's sort of true -- I clearly remember striking things people say or do, and certain moments are engraved in me -- but the overall memory is how it felt to be with them.

Yesterday a man (a stranger) was very nasty to me. In thinking about it later, I think I did something he felt was disrespectful (I did it out of ignorance) and I think he took it very personally. So ... the only thing this guy will remember about me after a week or so is that he felt disrespected and angry. Probably he won't really remember details of the whole thing.

I won't remember him either ... I'll just remember feeling sorry and somewhat resentful. Also sort of grateful ... I learned something from it.
 
  Reply With Quote
TiffanyDiamond is offline TiffanyDiamond Post #8  February 13,2011, 1:50pm
TiffanyDiamon…'s Avatar

is so in love!!

Veteran

Joined: Jul 2009

Posts: 1,200

See profile

I completely agree. People say that they like to be around me because they say I am a good listener, I am non-judgemental and they can tell me anything and they feel safe that I can keep their secrets.

There are several people that I like to be around...one is a good friend who makes me laugh all the time. She is always so happy and no matter how horrible I might be feeling at the time she makes me smile and laugh and forget about my cares the entire time I am with her. She is just a lovely person. I'm smiling now just thinking about her.

I love to be around my honey because when he looks at me I can feel the love that he has for me. I feel safe, adored, protected. All that and more.

I love being around my youngest child because she has the sweetest disposition and she just makes me feel happy. And that's a miracle - SHE'S A TEENAGER after all!!!
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply


« "Voo doo" as therapy to release past relationship anger? | About You | How much do you let your past affect your current dating style? »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Topics
Topic Topic Starter Board Replies Last Post
A Woman's dating responsibilities BabyYoda Dating 151 January 13,2011 4:54pm
Mosque at Ground Zero? brixjnz Politics 234 November 11,2010 9:45am
Question: Why is socialism bad? The1Tomcat Politics 401 October 4,2010 2:08pm
Dealing with emotionally uninvolved individuals BabyYoda About You 38 August 25,2010 3:57pm
10 things that make you feel good nightling About You 22 May 30,2010 9:59am

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“Umm....I don't think you are clearly seeing this guy for who he is. He has been with two women at all times... First...it was his wife and you...Then it was you and this other woman....And then now ... ” –  Ingytravel

Join the “Reuniting with EX” discussion

“Simple answer to the OP's question: NO. The drama isn't worth it. Tell your boyfriend you don't want to be around him when he's like this (and mean it). Go away, find other things to do, and ... ” –  Lindac7

Join the “Dating a Moody Guy. Is the Drama Worth It???” discussion

“But they are all "jocks," so none interest her. Not only would they never like or get her nerdiness since they are jocks, but as jocks, they don't read, go to museums, go to plays, eat, breath... ... ” –  emma_hazards

Join the “Super active/physically fit men not a match” discussion

“ Heh. I was thinking the same thing, I remember this thread from nearly 2 years ago! But, it is definitely fascinating to see the chip on some people's shoulders, when old threads like this get ... ” –  ScottK

Join the “Do men prefer thin women?” discussion

“Thank you everyone for replying...I think I know what's the right thing to do now. I haven't dated a lot and your advice is very helpful. On a side note, yes, he claims that this is his first time ... ” –  smilingeye

Join the “single mother asking for advice: when to introduce him to my children?” discussion

“No. Usually I am thinking In God's name, why is that kid shrieking like that?! Doesn't his mother hear him? Maybe it gets to the point where the kid's own mother can't even hear him anymore, but ... ” –  Faraday

Join the “Saw You Look” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 7:47am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0