Do platonic friends do this?


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my5cents is offline my5cents Post #1  January 28,2011, 3:26pm
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Men and women, in your friendships with the opposite sex do you find the following: Flirting with the other person, commenting on how the other person looks in a good way, and telling them they are attractive to you? Is this in the realm of platonic friendship or sort of on the borderline of something more?

The platonic friendships I do have with males have never really included these things but more "You like nice, or nice haircut." but that's about it. I have someone doing the above (1st paragraph) but who has stressed just friendship and nothing more.

What have all your experiences been thus far?
Last edited by my5cents; January 29,2011 at 7:25am.
 
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Ingytravel is online now Ingytravel Post #2  January 28,2011, 3:30pm
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Some people are just very flirty and outspoken with their love for the opposite sex..

If this person has stressed that he only wants to be friends with you...I wouldn't try to read much in to it..

If it bothers you..then I would speak up if he is truly your friend...tell him that it makes you feel uncomfortable or is giving you mixed signals..
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #3  January 28,2011, 6:29pm
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I agree with Ingytravel.

I have been known to flirt at times when I thought the impossibility of anything was clear (workplace, gym, usually much older, married women.) It's just good fun, when in the context of impossibility.

If the context is a person of potential (right class and age, available), then it could be more ...

Unfortunately, if he flirts with available, appropriate people other than potential partners, I'd be disinclined to consider the person (bad boundaries, inability to drive a deal to conclusion.)
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #4  January 28,2011, 7:54pm
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I've been known to do it when I consider the person "safe" (unavailable). In fact, the "safer" they are...the more I feel free to indulge.

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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #5  January 28,2011, 8:01pm
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I'm unavailable, if you want to indulge.
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #6  January 28,2011, 8:22pm
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Mmmm...tempting...

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annother is offline annother Post #7  January 28,2011, 11:40pm
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There is a big difference between telling someone they look good and telling them that you find them attractive. The first is more an objective assessment of clothing or hairstyle etc. The second is a subjective reflection on arousal, even if in a very limited way. Both can be flirtatious, but the second crosses the line from platonic to romantic, in my view.
 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #8  January 29,2011, 6:40am
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Is this someone who you are in a relationship with and is actively flirting with friends, while you are there? Some people enjoy the attention / ego boost from it.......If someone is flirting with you ..(or anyone) they are (in addition to having fun) testing potential......
my5cents wrote :
Flirting with the other person, commenting on how the other person looks in a good way, and telling them they are attractive to you? Is this in the realm of platonic friendship or sort of on the borderline of something more? I have someone doing the above but who has stressed just friendship and nothing more.
 
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LizziePooh is offline LizziePooh Post #9  January 29,2011, 8:34am

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my5cents wrote :
I have someone doing the above (1st paragraph) but who has stressed just friendship and nothing more.
I am curious about this part, my5cents. How did he stress friendship and who brought it up/how did it come up?

And I am just wondering, do you want to be more than friends with him? Just wondering...I think you have an advantage since he does find you attractive...

Just a thought.
 
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Ingytravel is online now Ingytravel Post #10  January 29,2011, 8:38am
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Wiseman2 wrote :
Is this someone who you are in a relationship with and is actively flirting with friends, while you are there? Some people enjoy the attention / ego boost from it.......If someone is flirting with you ..(or anyone) they are (in addition to having fun) testing potential......
Good question...I admit I assumed it was a friend of hers flirting with her...but your right...it could be read as a man she is dating and flirting with someone else...hope the OP comes back to clarify
 
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