Talking about Ex to opposite-sex friends


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morningsunlight is offline morningsunlight Post #11  June 29,2010, 4:56pm
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Sassafras54 wrote :
"He's like a brother" ... maybe that's it. Once you feel like brother-sister, no one wants to go from there to romance.

That might explain me and my college friend too. H'mmm.

It's different from "friend-zone". "Brother-zone".
Brother-zone is like the greatest trust. Basically, I'd value, respect, and care about them for the rest of my life. They also say "love" and "dearest" in their emails and tell me they would always be there for me at anytime. These have been proven countlessly for many years regardless of our relationship status and I would not expect these to change. I do not like it when people cannot think of love only from romantic perspectives and disregard friendships.
 
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morningsunlight is offline morningsunlight Post #12  June 29,2010, 6:13pm
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
You should not discuss your ex with your matches / dates. It is appropriate to discuss your ex with your opposite sex friends. This may well be a good idea as they may be able to offer a perspective on your failed relationship that your same sex friends cannot.

I suspect that you are looking for instant sparks as an indication that you should / can / want to build a romantic relationship with the person. With your opposite sex friends you did not feel instant sparks and gave them the opportunity to build and grow a friendship over a long time. (This all assumes that these friends are not people that you grew up with and have known since you were both small children)
I usually make friends in a group of friends. So I become good friends with everyone. None of them comes across as a date/match from the very beginning. There are certainly friendly-flirty guys but they are so to everyone and nothing more than a friendship.
 
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