VB_Girl is offline VB_Girl Post #1  April 6,2010, 5:58pm
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I had a date a couple of weeks ago and we happened to be passing a church. He asked if I attended and I said I wasn't a regular attendee, but it was the Easter season and I said I would be going the following Sunday. He said that although he liked the community feeling of going to church, it's kind of a lonely place for single people. I could see his point and didn't disagree.

So my question is, if things develop further (and I certainly hope they do ), at what point would you feel comfortable going to church together? We are of different faiths (catholic and anglican), but they are close.

Thoughts??
 
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meri75 is offline meri75 Post #2  April 6,2010, 6:03pm
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Assuming we were of the same or similar denomination, I would feel comfortable once we had moved beyond dating into relationship. Partly, this has nothing to do with faith, but with the knowledge that my 'church family' do actually treat me as their daughter, sister, etc; which means he will come under a (hopefully subtle and gentle!) microscope at first.
 
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VB_Girl is offline VB_Girl Post #3  April 6,2010, 6:13pm
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I tend to go to a couple of churches so I don't really have a "church family". It didn't seem like he was opposed to going, he just doesn't like going alone.
 
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melman is offline melman Post #4  April 6,2010, 6:22pm
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I guess I would be uncomfortable about it if I was concerned about what the "church family" would think.

But my experience is much like the OP and her match. I have attended the same church for many years and I am all but invisible there. I could come in with a hot new eH match under each arm, and no one would bat an eye.

It's not the first place I would take a date, but if the topic came up in discussion and you want to give it a try, I say "why not?".
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #5  April 6,2010, 6:23pm
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I believe, but I don't go. So I'd have to be married.

j8a
 
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LizziePooh is offline LizziePooh Post #6  April 6,2010, 6:24pm

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I agree with Melman. I think matching faiths and matching similar importance of faith (if one has one) is important.

Since you indicate that Easter you would go to but not otherwise, I assume the next time will probably be around Christmas time.
 
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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #7  April 6,2010, 6:28pm
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If he was interested I would take him as soon as he was willing to go. I'd probably ask him right away if he wanted to come with me.

I'd ask to go to his right away too.

Even though I go to a very large church, I'm sure people would notice when I'd show up with someone.
 
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VB_Girl is offline VB_Girl Post #8  April 6,2010, 6:40pm
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LizziePooh wrote :
I agree with Melman. I think matching faiths and matching similar importance of faith (if one has one) is important.

Since you indicate that Easter you would go to but not otherwise, I assume the next time will probably be around Christmas time.
I'm going to a wedding in June, so there is at least one more between now and Christmas.
 
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singinggirl is offline singinggirl Post #9  April 6,2010, 6:40pm
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My kids and I go to church practically all the time--Sunday morning and evening and Wednesday evening. I am very conservative and go to a Christian evangelical church.

My bf, OTOH, calls himself Catholic, but never goes to church. He doesn't say he never goes; he just always says it's been a while. (We've been together more than 2 years and he's never been to "his church" once.)

We had been dating about a year before I asked him to go with me. He did and it wasn't a big deal. I feel comfortable asking him to go; he seems to feel comfortable going. I'm not really sure why I waited as long as I did to ask him the first time.

If you are comfortable saying "Wanna go with me sometime?", I'd just do it.

Edit: Oh, and people always notice if I bring someone with me. I go to a church with a lot of older people and I always have people wanting to say hi and be introduced. Makes life entertaining!
 
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VB_Girl is offline VB_Girl Post #10  April 6,2010, 6:47pm
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melman wrote :
I guess I would be uncomfortable about it if I was concerned about what the "church family" would think.

But my experience is much like the OP and her match. I have attended the same church for many years and I am all but invisible there. I could come in with a hot new eH match under each arm, and no one would bat an eye.

It's not the first place I would take a date, but if the topic came up in discussion and you want to give it a try, I say "why not?".
I figured that if I decided to be go and he happened to be around, I would probably ask.
 
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