JFo is offline JFo Post #21  March 27,2010, 10:16am
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I don't get it. Why is this young man suddenly a creep? Because he was infatuated with one of the girls in his classes? Oh my God, stop the presses! He must be evil.

Any guy who has ever been a young man at one point in his life knows what's going on here. You meet a girl that strikes your fancy, and for whatever reason, you build her up over all the other one's you know. Sure, you may be interested in some other girls, but this one is the prize of them all. Maybe it's how she looks. Maybe it's her personality. Maybe it's her sense of humor. Maybe it's a combination of all of these things and more. Whatever it is, she's the one you want more than all the others and as much as you try to forget about her, you just can't get her out of your mind.

There's only one problem: she's not interested in you. You're not sure why, but ultimately it doesn't matter. She doesn't reciprocate your feelings and when you receive confirmation that either she's not interested or she's with another guy (who's almost always a jerk by the way), it devastates you.

Now, there certainly is a difference between infatuation and unhealthy obsession. If this young man crossed that line and made the girl feel threatened, that's a different story. However, nothing in the original post suggests anything of sort happened. My guess is that this girl knew how this young man felt and rather than outright tell him that she wasn't interested and crush him in public, she brought along her potential mate so he could see she was already taken and couldn't be with him because of that (and not because she didn't like him).
 
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Iconography is offline Iconography Post #22  March 27,2010, 10:23am
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JFo, nobody said that the student was a creep. Oregon_Coast_Guy and I mere raised the possibility of such a scenario, and Justme admitted that he perhaps had overlooked "the creep factor." Not that he saw it, not that it was there, but only that he hadn't thought to look for it.
 
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JFo is offline JFo Post #23  March 27,2010, 10:39am
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Iconography wrote :
JFo, nobody said that the student was a creep. Oregon_Coast_Guy and I mere raised the possibility of such a scenario...
This is what Oregon_Coast_Guy said:

wrote :
Poor guy? What about "poor girl?" She needed to bring along another guy in order to get the creepo to leave her alone.
It sounds to me like this poor guy is being called a creep (or rather a "creepo").
 
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Iconography is offline Iconography Post #24  March 27,2010, 10:51am
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Ah... True. I read that as a hypothetical, but yes, I see your point, JFo.
 
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trixie1868 is offline trixie1868 Post #25  March 27,2010, 5:03pm

what the bejeezus is going on round here?!

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This thread was autobiographical wasn't it?
 
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newbie40something is offline newbie40something Post #26  March 27,2010, 5:13pm
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Trixie.......you crack me up!!!!
 
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Oregon_Coast_Guy is offline Oregon_Coast_Guy Post #27  March 27,2010, 6:12pm
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JFo wrote :
This is what Oregon_Coast_Guy said:



It sounds to me like this poor guy is being called a creep (or rather a "creepo").

I would guess that most women would not bring in a guy to emphasize a rejection unless the guy didn't get it through his head the first (or possibly second) time around.
 
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Avalon1k is offline Avalon1k Post #28  March 27,2010, 6:14pm
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trixie1868 wrote :
This thread was autobiographical wasn't it?

Well since Justme has flown the coop we will never know. In any case we don't know the whole story. The young man could have been harassing her outside of class, etc. I have a friend who has a guy who is literally breaking into her house (she dated him a couple of times) and she just wishes he would go away. Obsession is never a good thing.
 
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MelinCali is offline MelinCali Post #29  March 27,2010, 7:23pm
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justme27 wrote :
Gasp, I'm speechless and insulted. I've never felt so violated in my life...oh wait, you didn't write anything substantial. Nonetheless, the typical Ehahaha response is always warranted when someone has been stalking you.

Now, you aren't going boil my bunny are you?
Justme, I just saw this today and see that you are no longer a member... but I think you might still be reading.

This exemplifies the kind of strangeness I have seen in your postings lately. I did not stalk you. I read threads, in which you posted (there's nobody on my ignore list) and I saw weird comments that were unwarranted and actually sounded paranoid or reading insults where there clearly were none. I found it so perplexing that it stuck in my mind.

I wish you the best with your therapy and hope you will come to a point where you don't see negativity when people are merely offering their advice, or sharing their opinions or observations. I assumed this kind of feedback would be helpful to you in developing your interactions with others since I know you are in therapy, but I have never needed therapy, so my assumption could be wrong.

I hope you get what you need out of therapy, since it's clear you weren't getting it here. I think you have a lot of work to do yet, but you seem to be ready to do the work you need to, so I'm sure you'll get there.
Last edited by MelinCali; March 28,2010 at 8:17am. Reason: clarification
 
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