I do not care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.


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mrflyer is offline mrflyer Post #21  February 11,2010, 1:47pm
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Chris313 wrote :
I知 almost 34, living with my folks, and have taken a break from school in order to look for work. That doesn稚 sound all that appealing as a partner to me.
First of all, you don't have to tell potential dates your full story right away, and second, how it comes across depends a lot on how you tell it.

You're looking for work, which a lot of people are right now, so it's not like you live with your parents because you don't want to work.

You have an education, which is more than some people have.

I don't see why you can't date right now. It's really none of their business where you live at first- you shouldn't be trying to bring them home right away.

I disagree with the idea that your life has to be perfect before you start dating. I didn't date in high school because I knew I was moving out of state after graduation. Then I didn't date in college because I didn't have much money. Then I didn't date because I was looking for work. Then I got a job and didn't date because I was too busy at work.... this pattern could continue my whole life if I didn't realize what was going on and stop it.
 
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Chris313 is offline Chris313 Post #22  February 11,2010, 1:54pm
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Thanks for all the advice on an admittedly vague initial post. Let me try to sum things up a bit.

A few years back I lost a job near the end of lease and ended up moving back in with the folks until I could get back on my feet. I was successful in finding another job and was geared up to move back out when that job decided to relocate and not take me with it. Feeling like a disposable commodity, and with the okay from my folks, I decided to get an engineering degree in order to make myself more marketable.

Fast forward a couple of years and one associate痴 degree later and I知 growing rather antsy. I知 tired of living with my folks and I知 feeling as though I should be on my own and living a completely different life. There was also a lot of drama last year that kind of broke my spirit down a bit. So, I知 taking a break from school for a semester or two in order to get a job so that I can move out again. Once I have said job I plan on going to school part time until I get my degree.

The problem I posted about was that I have been receiving messages from interested parties and have talked with them and told them flat out where I am in life. No point in lying about who I am. I知 guessing that my perception that someone of merit shouldn稚 be interested in me is just a reflection of my low self esteem and feelings of inadequacy/underachieviness. I need to tell them that it may be a little while before I'm actually ready to date.

So, thank you again for all of the advice given. It has helped out and I am taking measures to get my spirits back up and fix things before trying to date. I知 on a better diet, exercising, writing in a journal, and relaxing with a cup of tea and a book instead of watching the tele. Hopefully it値l work.
 
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