Girls not knowing what they want


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thisguy86 is offline thisguy86 Post #1  January 14,2010, 6:26pm
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Sometimes I feel girls don't really know what kind of guy they want. Girls in their 20s write in their profile that they don't want older guys in their 50s hitting on them, but when the girls see my pic, they say I look too young, like under 18.
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #2  January 14,2010, 6:45pm
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I think considering your photos is the right way to address this specific complaint.
 
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Wonderwoman402 is offline Wonderwoman402 Post #3  January 14,2010, 6:57pm
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It's not just girls in their 20s who don't know what they want... guys in their 40s & 50s also often don't know what they want.

Your photo does look a little young... I would have pegged you for my son's age, and he's 18. Perhaps you could get a friend or relative to take some photos of you from different angles and different settings to get a better perception of you and your age for your profile.
 
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peg099 is offline peg099 Post #4  January 14,2010, 7:00pm
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And there's also a huge difference between not wanting someone in their 50s vs going after someone who looks like a teen. Maybe they'd be perfectly happy with a guy who looks late 20s or 30ish.
 
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RoxyRedhead is offline RoxyRedhead Post #5  January 14,2010, 7:34pm

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I think you mentioned that you aren't on dating sites, or maybe I misremember-in any case, one of the curses of having a younger face is not being taken seriously.

I've had this all my life-and was 'carded' on my 39th birthday. However, now that I'm 67 and can easily pass for 50 I like it a lot.

If you are on a dating site, do make sure your picture shows you at a good advantage.

In real life, there isn't much you can do about being judged for how you look. Eventually you'll find someone who appreciates what you have to offer-assuming you are actually looking and not just spending every day on eHa posting topics.

I can't decide if you're pulling our collective legs or serious.
 
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MelinCali is offline MelinCali Post #6  January 14,2010, 7:41pm
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OP, from your posts, I wonder if you are just not understanding how to know if a girl (or woman) knows what she wants. Trying to remember from your past threads....You ask questions like whether a girl would date someone if he was employee of the month, grows a moustache or plays guitar hero.

None of these things are real and substantial criteria for wanting to date someone. They are small details about a person.

Nothing replaces a shared sense of humor, interests, attraction and sense of connection. For only some of these things a person can very clearly know what they want--for others (attraction and "chemistry") it is too intangible, so it takes meeting people to see if it's there.
 
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MelinCali is offline MelinCali Post #7  January 14,2010, 7:43pm
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BTW, I can say without a doubt when I was in my 20s, I didn't really know too much about what I wanted, but I didn't want 50 year-olds to hit on me, and I wasn't interested in robbing the cradle.
 
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qt_py is offline qt_py Post #8  January 16,2010, 8:26am

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You can always photoshop some facial hair on your pictures
 
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AndieIsMe is offline AndieIsMe — Advice Member-Moderator Post #9  January 16,2010, 9:45am
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You have been blessed with a younger looking face. This can be both good and bad.

Do take some new photos. The deer in the headlights front on type are unattractive for anyone.

I am in my mid 30's, I won't date men in their 50's. I also tend to not want to date men in their 20's as well. It also depends on the person. Self confidence and attitude make a huge difference in how someone else sees you.
 
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Oregon_Coast_Guy is offline Oregon_Coast_Guy Post #10  January 16,2010, 9:35pm
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"Not knowing what I want" is a nicer way of saying, "definitely not you."
 
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