Am I missing something here?


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nightling is offline nightling Post #11  November 21,2009, 11:24am
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Perhaps to her someone who wears cologne is someone who pays attention to personal hygiene and how appealing they are to their mate, and that's important to her.
 
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LizziePooh is offline LizziePooh Post #12  November 21,2009, 11:27am

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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
To me the operative words are "important to me". I read those words as indicating that if I don't wear cologne then I will be rejected and that who the guy is and what he stands for are unimportant as long as he wears cologne.
I knew you read that as that - I think you are making a big deal out of nothing.
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #13  November 21,2009, 11:29am
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
This is part of an answer to one of my Second Questions and no it is not taken out of context:

"I like a man who wears cologne....that is important to me."

Is this not the epitome of shallowness or am I missing something here?

This brings up another question which I have no experience with. I will assume that if it is important to her that the guy is wearing cologne then she probably considers it equally important that she wear perfume. So my question to the ladies would be if you are wearing perfume can you tell (smell) if the guy is wearing cologne unless his cologne is even more powerful than your perfume?
"that is important to me" That makes it sound almost like a 'Must Have'. Really? That would be kind of weird to me. Like, 'it's important to me that a man wear Hanes underwear.'
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #14  November 21,2009, 11:32am
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
To me the operative words are "important to me". I read those words as indicating that if I don't wear cologne then I will be rejected and that who the guy is and what he stands for are unimportant as long as he wears cologne.
Lilycat wrote :
I think you are overanalysing the whole thing myself.......

What if it is just an innocent remark? Go meet her, find out for real.

Great Guy has a valid concern.

If I wrote you and said "it is important to me" that a woman is thin, would you pay to take me to dinner?
 
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nightling is offline nightling Post #15  November 21,2009, 11:34am
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D_Lion wrote :
Great Guy has a valid concern.

If I wrote you and said "it is important to me" that a woman is thin, would you pay to take me to dinner?
I wouldn't take you to dinner regardless of what you wrote.
 
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ami1uwant is online now ami1uwant Post #16  November 21,2009, 11:38am
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I am allergic to cologne. So I cant wear it....I guess that means I am ruled out.....
 
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LizziePooh is offline LizziePooh Post #17  November 21,2009, 11:48am

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D_Lion wrote :
Great Guy has a valid concern.

If I wrote you and said "it is important to me" that a woman is thin, would you pay to take me to dinner?
Important to me that a woman is thin is that the woman communicating should be thin. This is a clear indication that a heavy woman should close the match because she won't be his cup of tea.

Important to me that a man wears cologne could be that he has to wear cologne or could be that it is important that he smells good, or could be that she dated a guy with bad BO, or etc., etc., etc

Getting a comment like that and assuming the person is the "epitome of shallowness" is an issue with the receiver of the comment not the person making the comment. And if that is not enough, getting that comment and assuming the person must wear perfume and must wear so much perfume that they can't smell anything else just shows that this is not a legitimate concern. Or the concern is misplaced.

He could have a legitimate concern that the woman would only date a man that wears cologne and he does not. And he could respond with a cute answer like - I don't need cologne and I am willing to submit to a sniff test when we meet.

To make her into some shallow, over-zealous perfume wearing woman is not the right response.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #18  November 21,2009, 11:54am
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LizziePooh wrote :
And he could respond with a cute answer like - I don't need cologne and I am willing to submit to a sniff test when we meet.

Good one!

And I suggested initially that he go forward with her.

But, the women in the thread seemed not to understand how a man might legitimately feel, so I made an analogy for them.
 
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Sassafras54 is online now Sassafras54 — Advice Official Moderator Post #19  November 21,2009, 11:55am
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What was the question she was answering?
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #20  November 21,2009, 12:49pm
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...things seem to have gotten quiet around here.

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I just smell like Acqua di Gio naturally and don't need to wear cologne. Does that mean she'd rule me out? lol

Darn it...I forgot my cologne down in Mexico last weekend.
Last edited by jayjay; November 21,2009 at 12:51pm.
 
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