SierraMountainAir is offline SierraMountainAir Post #71  November 4,2009, 6:49am
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scarlet13 wrote :




i know men who also proudly exclaim how they successfully hid money from their ex's lawyer. it's sick.

I know women do that too (my ex got caught doing it over and over and defied the divorce Judge.)


Common with "BOTH" genders.


My guess would be that the defenseless CHILDREN suffer most when this happens.
 
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Can_I_just_be_Jo is offline Can_I_just_be_Jo Post #72  November 4,2009, 6:58am

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scarlet13 wrote :


i know men who also proudly exclaim how they successfully hid money from their ex's lawyer. it's sick.
My ex pulled all our savings which I didn't touch on the advice of my lawyer. Judge Judy(no lie my judge's name was Judy) didn't do a darn thing. He tried to shelter his 401k but got smited there. He actually tried to argue that I didn't earn a penny of it cause I was a housewife. I called him a salesman he lept across the table and tried to strangle me. Judge Judy started figuring out who was the lier after that.

Mine was a very ugly very expensive divorce. He couldn't hurt me so he hurt our kids to get back at me. I would have given him everything just to get them away from him. I keep seeing men post that the courts protect the women. Well I got news for you, the courts do not protect the children. In my opinion they are the ones who should be the focus. Meh they are safe now, well mine are.
 
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SierraMountainAir is offline SierraMountainAir Post #73  November 4,2009, 7:21am
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Can_I_just_be_Jo wrote :
My ex pulled all our savings which I didn't touch on the advice of my lawyer. Judge Judy(no lie my judge's name was Judy) didn't do a darn thing. He tried to shelter his 401k but got smited there. He actually tried to argue that I didn't earn a penny of it cause I was a housewife. I called him a salesman he lept across the table and tried to strangle me. Judge Judy started figuring out who was the lier after that.

In San Francisco Superior Court that would be "attempted murder" for which he would be INSTANTLY arrested, jailed and prosecuted separately, and your divorce proceedings contnued.

WOW! How could you marry, and then have BABIES with, some monster like THAT!!!

Divorce Courts, (in case you don't know) are the most VIOLENCE prone of ALL of them and Courtroom security in them is - and should be - * very * tight, though the court bailiffs usually do NOT pack, because in the scuffles their firearms could be seized by an enraged combatant and used on THEM.


If the bailiffs took some licks in the Courtroom, they WOULD for sure, meet out a leetle payback during transportation up to the 6th floor for booking, on the ride in the Jail elevator, where NO witnesses exist, and the perp would go for the FAMOUS "ride in the elevator" where the deputies would have their time to play "catch up" and work him over with their sticks, and play them on his head like a marimba.

("You knock out ONE of my teeth, so say the LEO's, and *I* will knock out ALL of your teeth" --- so goes the Police mentality everywhere, anywhere. Only TWO kinds of people exist, to the Police: "Us. -- and everyone else. )


Guess what I did before I retired.
Last edited by 6dle899; November 4,2009 at 7:30am.
 
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alissag is offline alissag Post #74  November 4,2009, 7:28am
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Good lord... Some of these stories!! Thank god my divorce had two pretty level headed people involved. While we did have lawyers, to deal with some deeper legal matters (shared business), we never went to court or stood in front of a judge. My ex and I sat down, without lawyers, like sane adults, hashed out our agreement and took the information back to our lawyers to draft. For child support we used the formula, and here, in California, it is based on my income, his income and the percentage of custody. We share 50/50 custody and if we had the same income, there would be ZERO payments made by either one of us, it's a wash.

I understand that there are some of the "nasty" women out there and some of the "nasty" men, too. IMO, if someone holds these stereotypes and makes these assumptions, that's baggage! Baggage that renders them unable to have a healthy relationship. I choose not to date those ones.

From reading this thread, there are a lot more carrying around that baggage than I thought! Hmmm, maybe that's why I'm still single
 
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Can_I_just_be_Jo is offline Can_I_just_be_Jo Post #75  November 4,2009, 7:37am

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6dle899 wrote :
In San Francisco Superior Court that would be "attempted murder" for which he would be INSTANTLY arrested, jailed and prosecuted separately, and your divorce proceedings contnued.

WOW! How could you marry, and then have BABIES with, some monster like THAT!!!

Divorce Courts, (in case you don't know) are the most VIOLENCE prone of ALL of them and Courtroom security in them is - and should be - * very * tight, though the court bailiffs usually do NOT pack, because in the scuffles their firearms could be seized by an enraged combatant and used on THEM.


If the bailiffs took some licks in the Courtroom, they WOULD for sure, meet out a leetle payback during transportation up to the 6th floor for booking, on the ride in the Jail elevator, where NO witnesses exist, and the perp would go for the FAMOUS "ride in the elevator" where the deputies would have their time to play "catch up" and work him over with their sticks, and play them on his head like a marimba.

("You knock out ONE of my teeth, so say the LEO's, and *I* will knock out ALL of your teeth" --- so goes the Police mentality everywhere, anywhere. Only TWO kinds of people exist, to the Police: "Us. -- and everyone else. )


Guess what I did before I retired.
We were young and happy when we were first married. He can't handle stress and as we got older the stress of a family business got worse. He didn't get truely awful until a year before I filed. After I filed he just spiraled out of control.

When the bailiff stood he sat down quickly. Tried to talk his way out of it. Guess he did a good enough job because he was only warned.

Alissag, if I had a dollar for every time I told him he is only making our attorneys rich I would never have to work again. He wanted to hurt me any way he could. His lawyer was awful, he fought stuff he knew he wouldn't win. Added depos that would yeild no benefit. He knew he had an angry man and there was gold in them there hills.
Last edited by Can_I_just_be_Jo; November 4,2009 at 7:46am.
 
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notyet is offline notyet Post #76  November 4,2009, 8:46am
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Can_I_just_be_Jo wrote :
...Well I got news for you, the courts do not protect the children...
this, i can agree with.
 
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Harvey7 is offline Harvey7 Post #77  November 4,2009, 11:59am

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jayjay wrote :
I wouldn't hold it against a woman to get child support, as long as it wasn't some really ridiculous arrangement. I don't know why a woman wouldn't want child support, regardless of how much money she makes. I mean, I'd want to contribute to the well being of any children that I had, regardless of a court order. Though, after they became adults I'd want to use my money to help my children in the way I see fit, rather than continuing to pay this to my ex to spend on them as she chose.
Well said Double J, my feeling as well.

Harvey7.
 
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Harvey7 is offline Harvey7 Post #78  November 4,2009, 12:20pm

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Can_I_just_be_Jo wrote :
The ex lived in a bigger house than he did. She was crying to the court that she would lose it if he didn't keep paying. I would think this is the worst in women, maybe hope is a better word.
I must say that you are the exception to the norm for ex-wives or the rule.
Child support is a non-negotiable item, it is theirs and they must have their own legal representation to view any offer and no one can abridge their right to collect it along with health insurance.

Harvey7.
 
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Can_I_just_be_Jo is offline Can_I_just_be_Jo Post #79  November 4,2009, 12:37pm

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Harvey7 wrote :
I must say that you are the exception to the norm for ex-wives or the rule.
Child support is a non-negotiable item, it is theirs and they must have their own legal representation to view any offer and no one can abridge their right to collect it along with health insurance.

Harvey7.
Not sure what you mean.
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #80  November 4,2009, 12:49pm

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OK I was thinking about this the other day...(about child support). If one spouse (man or woman) feels that the ex will take advantage of the child support money, what would be the downside of having provided the actual items instead of money? Or say in a different world, the system can actually specifically allocate x amount of agreeable money to rent, child's food and healthcare? Almost like a food voucher, but for the kids?

Don't rake me over the coals on this ok, I know it's a sensitive issue and I'm asking out of curiousity.
 
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