green1706 is offline green1706 Post #1  September 22,2009, 11:26am
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What is the ideal relationship between parents and children? This relationship should be more severe, parents imposing their terms automatically, or should it be a friendship? In the latter case, if the child benefit from parents' indulgence and do something stupid? I know that the situation varies from case to case, but I speak in general. My husband and I get ready to be parents again, we want to adopt for the first time, and therefore we want more opinions. So, what do you think?
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #2  September 22,2009, 2:43pm
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Children serve adults, and learn from them, until they become self-sufficient persons in their own right.

In other words, adults ought not to accept demands from children which impinge upon their interests.

Ultimately, children need to learn that life is hard and handouts hard to come by. This lessen is far easier to learn at 10 than 30.
 
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singinggirl is offline singinggirl Post #3  September 22,2009, 7:37pm
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I don't know that I would use the word 'severe', but I do think that it's the parents' responsibility to set limits for children and teach them appropriate behaviors for life. It is said that your values, ethics, and general behavior patterns are established by age 5. This is before kids have even begun regular K-12 school, so I think this stresses how important the role of the parent is.

When many of us were children, we learned how to behave at home. We were taught our manners and at least some basic etiquette. Unfortunately, as a teacher, I have seen very few children in the last several years who actually have learned these lessons at home. This is evidenced by the increase of 'character education' programs in public schools.

I want my kids to know that they can come to me when they have problems or questions or for any reason at all. However, I think it is a mistake to try to just be your child's friend. Children want and need limits and it is the adult's responsibility to provide those.

Sorry, guess this is a little long, but I have very strong opinions concerning this.
 
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