How do you do with "meeting the parents"


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eHA_Admin_Lori is offline eHA_Admin_Lori — Advice Official Moderator Post #1  July 31,2009, 4:11pm
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When it's time to meet your SO's parents, how do you do with them? Do you find it easy to get along with the parents of your love?

~~~

Ever since I was young I have always gotten along splendidly with my friend's parents and that good luck extends to the parents of my boyfriends (now ex's). Some I grew so close with that I started calling them "Mom" and "Dad". But I also work on some wedding Communties so I have seen my share of In-Law horror stories so I knwo that's not the case for everyone!
 
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hawqeye is offline hawqeye Post #2  July 31,2009, 5:26pm
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Talk about a rough couple of weeks.

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I did ok back in the day meeting my girlfriends parents.

Of course on the flip side I had a date earlier this year where I had dinner at her sisters, met her child, her nephew... then her parents stopped over! That was a little nerve racking.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #3  August 1,2009, 6:42am
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Never gotten that far.

But I usually get along with most people.

Just a personal thought on the meeting the family thing. I would like to do that somewhat early on in a relationship. If the relationship were to grow to long term I consider that the family and friends are also my family and friends and if we all don't mesh together then there is a problem.
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #4  August 1,2009, 8:56am
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[quote=Gr8Guyn2008;694762]
Just a personal thought on the meeting the family thing. I would like to do that somewhat early on in a relationship. If the relationship were to grow to long term I consider that the family and friends are also my family and friends and if we all don't mesh together then there is a problem




I would do it only if things got serious. No sense in dragging a long parade by everyone, one by one by one...

But I have news for you, Great Guy! You're probably not all going to "mesh" together. It just goes with the territory.

Some you like, some you don't. But you do have to be civil to them. That's what tongue-biting is for.
 
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bravethestorm is offline bravethestorm Post #5  August 1,2009, 11:28pm
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I usually ask for feedback on how the family reacts with each other before meeting the parents. It's a matter of getting a clue what the likes/dislikes are and what to expect.

Some parents are easy to get along with...others not so much. But considering my own dad is tough on the questions...I guess I've had plenty of experience on all sides.
 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #6  August 2,2009, 11:21am
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Interesting question. I think the movie "Meet the Parents" with Deniro is hilarious, because it can be so true. It's sometimes like an ink blot test they see what they want to see: you are the same person, yet some see a great potential son-in-law way too soon, and others you'll never be right or good enough for. Depends on the family dynamic there. In general the first time feels like an interview, because they want to know all about you.
 
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brneyedangel is offline brneyedangel Post #7  August 2,2009, 9:37pm
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I've been fortunate in that I've never had a problem with meeting the parents of past SOs. It's always been a very pleasant experience for me, and I've always been able to get along with them quite well. Of course, now that I've admitted that, I've probably jinxed myself!
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #8  August 3,2009, 8:51am
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brneyedangel wrote :
I've been fortunate in that I've never had a problem with meeting the parents of past SOs. It's always been a very pleasant experience for me, and I've always been able to get along with them quite well. Of course, now that I've admitted that, I've probably jinxed myself!
I suspect not
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #9  August 3,2009, 8:59am
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[quote=j0hn8andy;694868]
Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
Just a personal thought on the meeting the family thing. I would like to do that somewhat early on in a relationship. If the relationship were to grow to long term I consider that the family and friends are also my family and friends and if we all don't mesh together then there is a problem




I would do it only if things got serious. No sense in dragging a long parade by everyone, one by one by one...

But I have news for you, Great Guy! You're probably not all going to "mesh" together. It just goes with the territory.

Some you like, some you don't. But you do have to be civil to them. That's what tongue-biting is for.
I may not get along with Uncle Bob who the family only sees once every 5 years.

But if you wait until you are making plans for a life together until you meet the children, parents and others that are a regular daily part of your SO's life and find that you can't get along together then it is too late and you have wasted a significant amount of time on building a relationship that can't grow and survive.

Just my $.02. But of course what would I know about such things since I have never gotten to that point.
 
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chawks64 is offline chawks64 Post #10  August 3,2009, 4:30pm
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Ah, one of a few benefits to dating old(er) men!

No parents to disapprove!

And the kids usually like me because I'm just plain fun!
 
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