BRums is offline BRums Post #1  July 22,2009, 6:30pm
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Lately i have been noticeing a problem with what i am doing on dates, i have finaly figured out i have a slight desperation problem. Now before you say anything i just wanna say my underlining problem is that i don't even become myself when the date is occuring, not so much me doing constant texting and what not, as far as desparation goes. I guess what im asking is, how do i play cool and train myself to...be myself?
 
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jenx1128 is offline jenx1128 Post #2  July 22,2009, 6:34pm
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How do you mean? Are you acting like someone else on your dates? Sorry, your post was a bit confusing to me.
 
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BRums is offline BRums Post #3  July 22,2009, 6:41pm
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Well...i meant like while the date is going on...not all of my qualities are presented, like for instance i am VERY outgoing person, when i am with my friends im a fun, almost wild person, even when girls are present, but if it's a date i'm not like that at all, not because of shyness, but in my head i want the date to go...well....too well, what im trying to figure out is how do i play cool and actualy be 100% myself in a date, instead of some perfectionist drone that im not
 
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Shads is offline Shads Post #4  July 22,2009, 6:56pm
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BRums wrote :
Well...i meant like while the date is going on...not all of my qualities are presented, like for instance i am VERY outgoing person, when i am with my friends im a fun, almost wild person, even when girls are present, but if it's a date i'm not like that at all, not because of shyness, but in my head i want the date to go...well....too well, what im trying to figure out is how do i play cool and actualy be 100% myself in a date, instead of some perfectionist drone that im not

Just be yourself and do what you want. Because you don't want those qualities to emerge later on in the relationship and all of a sudden you're someone else.. LOL

Just tell yourself, "If she dosen't like me for me then its not going anywhere anyway."...
 
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BRums is offline BRums Post #5  July 22,2009, 6:58pm
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yeah i mean like i just think too much...way too much...and im like a drone haha
 
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Shads is offline Shads Post #6  July 22,2009, 7:08pm
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BRums wrote :
yeah i mean like i just think too much...way too much...and im like a drone haha

Don't think of what SHE wants or how you may think SHE wants you to act. Just be yourself no matter how much you hope she likes you.

I'm telling you.... just be yourself and let it all hang out...and accept the consequences. Then move on if it doesn't work out. And do it all over. One of those times your date will like you for you.....
 
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jenx1128 is offline jenx1128 Post #7  July 22,2009, 7:11pm
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Have you thought about meeting in a group of friends before you actually start fully dating someone? If you act more like yourself around your friends, she'll get to see what you're really like. And then if you start becoming Mr. Fakey, your friends will call you on it and get you to be yourself again.
 
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BRums is offline BRums Post #8  July 22,2009, 7:15pm
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sweet, those were good points, you guys are great
 
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jenx1128 is offline jenx1128 Post #9  July 22,2009, 7:31pm
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We try :-)

By the way, if a girl dislikes it when you are being yourself, she's not for you. Remember that.

Acting a certain way in hopes that a girl will like you because you pretend to be what she wants, well, that's like buying a Shelby Cobra in hopes of driving fast and then finding out it has the engine from a 1979 station wagon ;-)
 
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IcecreamMoon is offline IcecreamMoon Post #10  July 22,2009, 8:34pm
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BRums wrote :
I guess what im asking is, how do i play cool and train myself to...be myself?
Hi BRums,
Sorry, but this is toooo Simple - the answer is simply staring you in the face, no pickles -

Stop listening to other people (and their advice on who you should be);
Stop playing it cool;
Stop training yourself;
START BEING YOURSELF!!!

A little hint to remember along the way: Don't ever be afraid to be the beautiful person that you are - that's what you want to be liked and admired for anyway, right? Well, I hope so.

Good Luck!
Last edited by IcecreamMoon; July 22,2009 at 8:36pm. Reason: Thanks for the perfect 10 on this post. A rare moment of Lunatic Mad Brilliance... :)
 
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