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Manicbutterfly Manicbutterfly is offline
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Hey,

I have recently lost alot of weight and all of a sudden have lots of interest from the opposite sex, I'm still the same person and find it funny that a lot of people are so shallow, yes I look great, feel great now but as said I'm still the same person, more of a statement than a question but most men are quite shallow if they can't see past a persons apperance.

Something I have to come to terms with i guess.

Susan
- June 15th, 2009, 03:41 pm
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FirefighterTimWilver FirefighterTimWilver is offline
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FirefighterTimWilver "Well you and I travel to a beat of a different drum" - Mike Nesmith

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Hi Susan,
Yes I think it is unfortunate that many go by appearances. Perhaps it has to do with society's image of the "perfect man/woman." Everyday we are bombarded with super looking people in magazines, advertisements, tv shows and movies. It seems like if you are a guy you need to be 6'2" with bulging muscles and the girls need to be a size 5 and with a perfect tan. Maybe we have bought into Hollywoods image for to long. Actually, back in the Middle Ages, if a woman had a few extra pounds, she would be considered ideal. Well, just my thoughts. Glad you are feeling great though.
Tim
- June 15th, 2009, 03:52 pm
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D_Lion D_Lion is offline
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You’re not the same person.

You used to be a person who ate to excess, relative to your energy expenditure, which alone is symptomatic, if not indicative, of a lifestyle that is markedly different from some others’. Eating habits, as something we do every day, and usually together, are one of the more important compatibilities.

As is leisure activities, to which the foregoing also applies.

And “shallow” is pejorative, but, unlike gluttony, not one of the deadly sins your minister warned you about.

Congratulations, by the way!
- June 15th, 2009, 03:57 pm
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FirefighterTimWilver FirefighterTimWilver is offline
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Hmm I eat all the time and never gain any weight. I weighed 135lbs in high school...21 years ago and still do...its in the genes and not necessarily eating habits!
- June 15th, 2009, 04:12 pm
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D_Lion D_Lion is offline
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FirefighterTimWilver wrote :
Hmm I eat all the time and never gain any weight. I weighed 135lbs in high school...21 years ago and still do...its in the genes and not necessarily eating habits!

Genes are not relevant to the fact that weight is the accumulation over time of calories in minus calories out. At best, they affect how many calories a person needs to maintain an equilibrium weight at a given level of energy expenditure, and presumably his or her desire to eat.

Your frequency of eating is further not even related to your caloric intake (or expenditure.)
- June 15th, 2009, 04:29 pm
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neardc neardc is offline
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D_Lion wrote :
You’re not the same person.

You used to be a person who ate to excess, relative to your energy expenditure, which alone is symptomatic, if not indicative, of a lifestyle that is markedly different from some others’. Eating habits, as something we do every day, and usually together, are one of the more important compatibilities.

As is leisure activities, to which the foregoing also applies.

And “shallow” is pejorative, but, unlike gluttony, not one of the deadly sins your minister warned you about.

Congratulations, by the way!
And yet, her level of eating/diet and activity habits could be nearly identical to what they were before (especially if a change in metabolism or medication or illness is involved) even though she now weighs less. So, the only difference may be the weight, not "who" she is or her lifestyle or whose eating style she would be compatible with... She didn't tell us whether she made a real lifestyle change or not, so we don't know, but even if she did, my point is the same.

Not to mention that, in a great number of cases, if a woman's eating habits are identical to those of the man she's with, she would be overweight. It seems to me that a woman whose eating habits are compatible with Tim's would likely have quite a weight problem!
- June 15th, 2009, 04:38 pm
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scarlet13 scarlet13 is offline
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D_Lion wrote :
Genes are not relevant to the fact that weight is the accumulation over time of calories in minus calories out. At best, they affect how many calories a person needs to maintain an equilibrium weight at a given level of energy expenditure, and presumably his or her desire to eat.

Your frequency of eating is further not even related to your caloric intake (or expenditure.)
Science!
- June 15th, 2009, 04:38 pm
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Loves2Cook4U Loves2Cook4U is offline
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I beleive, based upon my limited understanding of biology and my personal experience, that both factors affect weight. While it is true that some people struggle with overweight issues most of their lives, why is it that some do not? Genetics, hormones, metabolism, activity level, all play into it, coupled with eating habits. However, to condemn a food addict is pretty harsh, since kicking the habit cold turkey is certain death. Any other addiction might be something which can be avoided, but as they say, you must feed the dragon 3 times a day. Type of food, amount, etc. all help, but it's still not under some people's scope of control, in my opinion. I met a very nice lady yesterday, who was slightly overweight, but I found her extremely attractive. Some of it depends on what you do with what God gave you. Which is why people who are so prejudicially judgmental based on weight or body type are a turn-off to others, they're not using the gray cells in their skulls which we so loosely call brains, not to mention the fact that their hearts may be disengaged from the whole process, too. I feel sorry for people who can't feel well because of weight issues, I've been there, but I don't condemn people who want to use that as a screening tool, that's their right. Maybe they don't want to be around someone for whom they always have to have compassion for, it could be taxing. There's someone for everyone.
- June 15th, 2009, 05:15 pm
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D_Lion D_Lion is offline
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Loves2Cook4U wrote :
Some opinions.

Let's go calling others "shallow" for awhile and then call it a day?
- June 15th, 2009, 05:22 pm
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Aidyl Aidyl is offline
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After I turned 40 I found my weight getting out of my control, or so I felt. For me, my weight is a huge issue. I fight every day to keep it with in my acceptable margin. I know I am not young anymore and my motablisum has changed as well as my activity levels, but I will not give up the battle. I see people all around me that just let it go, men more so than women, and it puzzles me. We hear everyday how we live in an obeas (damn spell check) society. It's not healthy and I want a partner that is healthy. Not someone that looks like a canadate for diabietis or a heart attack. What gets me is how our acceptance for the over weight has affected our children today. I have a 6 year old child that lives next door to me that weighs more than I do. You can't tell me that this is healthy. Sure she's big boned, but no 6 year old should ever weigh more than a hundred pounds and she is far beyond that mark. At 6 years old she is already on the road to a very unhealthy life. So to answer your question, "Why is physical apperance such an issue", I believe people are naturaly attracted to a healthy looking companion. A few extra pounds or even down sized, can be acceptable, but when it starts to look like it could affect their health, it becomes a turn off. There is nothing shallow about wanting a healthy looking partner. For some people the idea of excess weight is as big a turn off as a drunk or a druggy. Not a shallow concept, just practical.
- June 15th, 2009, 06:20 pm
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