Trying to deal with myself


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Katstime is offline Katstime Post #11  January 4,2009, 5:35am
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ShawnCole50, wrote :

Ok I just recently screwed up a something that might have been the best relationship in my life due to me smothering them and I have come to conclusion that maybe I need to quit being a needy person or someone that relies on someone else to make them happy. I need to learn to make myself happy is there any tips, clues or good books that can help me with this.
For me, I found that taking time off from dating/being in a relationship really helped. I was in a little different situation...I had been in a long marriage and had become so immersed in things that I lost who I was. For a year I just did things to take care of myself so I can find what does make me happy. In that time I realized I don't need some else to do that, that I can be happy with or with out someone in my life. Now I am ready to start dating. Good Luck!
 
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Shannan is offline Shannan Post #12  January 4,2009, 7:14am
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Candid_Witch,412976 wrote :

Happiness can't be found when you seek it yourself. Give it to others and it will find it's way back to you.
How can you give happiness to others if you haven't already sought it and found it for yourself? Sounds again like relying on other people for happiness, just twisted around a bit...
 
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meanminicooper is offline meanminicooper Post #13  April 1,2009, 8:11pm
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Shannan,413070 wrote :

Candid_Witch,412976 wrote :


Happiness can't be found when you seek it yourself. Give it to others and it will find it's way back to you.


How can you give happiness to others if you haven't already sought it and found it for yourself? Sounds again like relying on other people for happiness, just twisted around a bit...
AGREE!





All that does is breed dependency and clingyness.When you find happiness for yourself then you can be with someone because you want to, not because you *need* to
 
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javajava5 is offline javajava5 Post #14  April 1,2009, 9:49pm
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This is a thread back from January 2009, but people can most certainly post in it if they like.


JavaJava5
 
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sandyRN is offline sandyRN Post #15  April 2,2009, 5:14am

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javajava5 thanks for the invite to comment!


I have read this book called "five love languages"


It is written by a Christian author, but it applies to all of us. It says how we all feel love differently, and once you know your "language" it gives you a little more insight on how you act/react to others and how you perceive love.


I strongly reccommend this book to everyone looking for love, or answers of "why"...
 
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