I've been dating a guy for about 2 months - we are both divorced - he has kids and shares custody. He seems interested and keen.
But there are times I feel he is being secretive and I am unsure of whether I am being overly suspicious or whether he is being secretive. For example, I will tell him my plans - things like tomorrow nite I am going to the movies with Jane . He will tell me if he has his children but for other outings he will just say he is going out and later he'll mention that his friend was a she in conversation but never a name.
I'll talk about my friends by name - but he'll mostly refer to them by something descriptive about them like "my polish friend."
I think some of this is normal - but some of it makes me think he may be still dating other people - and I guess we may not have clearly drawn that line yet.... Am I being overly suspicious?
Should I bring it up with him? Is it a red flag?
I think might be. I'm that vague with people I don't know very well and am not in frequent contact with, not someone that I consider at least somewhat an intimate.
Whether its an issue imo depends on where you are at with physical intimacy in the relationship, and I would be weirded out if he were still dating others and we were getting busy on the couch together (even if there wasn't sex) unless it was clearly stated that one was dating others.
I would do one of two things:
ask
see him less and be more vague with him. you are probably telling him with whom at least partly to say "i'm not dating others" which might be why you think he is not disclosing who exactly he is seeing because he isn't disclosing.
Last edited by Nanette; March 19,2010 at 5:39pm.
Reason: lol the last line is confusing but its funny so i'm leaving it
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