I won't get into your third question, but I will dive in to your first two.

I've never used icebreakers. Frankly, I find them pointless. Many of the "vets" around here will tell you that icebreakers are the hallmark of non-paying members since that's the only way they can communicate.

As far as your second question goes, if you are a paying member, you really should take the time to initiate communication with matches you are interested in. Nothing ventured, nothing gained and all that. There's a good chance that most of the people that haven't bothered to initiate don't subscribe anyway, so closing them is no big deal, especially after a month.