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Cold turkey. It's the only way to rid your system of any addiction.
It will hurt and make you feel desperate at times but you two can't sort it out so you have to move on. I've always said that the biggest tragedy in life isn't not being loved, it's being loved and it still not being enough. 
I did it a year ago. Severed all contact. I'm not emotionally clear of it yet but I'm much more capable of protecting myself and much more content if I'm honest with myself. I miss the intoxicating highs but the lows were a price not worth paying.
Good luck.
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