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Bouffy is offline Bouffy Post #3  August 12,2009, 12:19pm
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isn't as easy to see through as you think.

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Joined: Jul 2008

Sault Ste. Marie ON

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Iceman696941 wrote :
I have been with my girlfriend for a little over 3 years. We lived together for most of those years but as of late have been living with our families because I am going away to finish school in a few weeks. Recently she went away for a month with her family to the Philippines. While she was away we spoke on occasion but not to often as she apparently had a lack of ways to communicate with me. That is something I came to understand as she had been in another country. Since then, she has been back for a little over two weeks now. I spent two days with me though she seemed hesitant to come to visit and the one thing that has not changed still is her communication with me. She doesn’t answer her phone or make any attempt to contact me like she use to before she left. When I call her up she always tells me she will call me back but does not and when I try to make plans her there is always something with her family that overlooks us getting together. Last night I expressed how I felt to her about this by asking her if anything has changed in our relationship then please let me know. If something were to have changed I rather to be upfront and not beat around the bush. She responded that she still loved me and her family is important and feels the time spend with me has overlooked them. She went on to tell me she can’t think and doesn’t want to speak about it. I don’t know what to think anymore. I feel as if I am being put on the backburner. I’m not going to try and push her away from her family as they should be important but I would like to feel like I am still apart of her life. Each day I now look to my phone waiting for her to call but deep down know she won’t and the longer I don’t hear from her it eats away at me. I would appreciate it if someone could help so that maybe I could understand everything a little more.
Well it sounds like a tough situation for sure! With 3 years of history I wouldn't be so concerned about it. Perhaps this is a good time to get to know her family more? Why not arrange to spend time with them and have her see how you are able to be with them.

If her family is pressuring her to break up with you she might respond in a fashion like you describe. Why not try to connect with them and show them how great a person you are. I'm sure it would make them feel reassured if you were able to be with them and their daughter; it would express desire to belong and that you have the ability to be yourself. Be patient with her. Don't wait around until its too late though! Just do your thing. It'll be good.
 
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