So as some of you know I have been seeing this girl for about a month and a half. She is very busy as a full time medical student. I think this is awesome and work very hard to be very supportive of her academic pursuits. We have both talked about the possibility of being together long term. This would mean that for the next 8 or so years she would be this busy or more so as she does courses, labs, internships, and eventual residency before becoming a fully fledged MD. We both would want to have children in this time frame just to add some complexity to the mix.

Our dates are great and we can talk for hours about anything as we are both well read. We share the same Christian beliefs. She is from China and has lived in the states for over 15 years and is working on full citizenship shortly. She is beautiful, smart, kind, and ambitious; all the things that I have always wanted and more.

However; all this being said and feeling that this is great and would be happy to have this be the reality here is the problem. I only get to see her one day a week at most. This is understandable with her studies and something I can accept. But what is really hard is the fact that she rarely sends me any emails, texts, or picks up the phone. I work during the day and have plenty of friends and activities to keep me busy but I want to hear from her once in awhile. The average per week is one call to work out what we are doing on the weekend. I send her a few texts or an email during the week to ask after her but I rarely hear back from these. When I call her (always at night when she is out of class) she rarely answers. I don’t want to bother or smother her, or distract her from her studies. That would be the last thing I want. But what I don’t want is to simply be her weekly entertainment for a few hours on a weekend evening.

So how can I address this lack of communication in a caring way that expresses my needs without intruding on hers? Am I asking to much to get a text/email/ or phone call about how she is doing every few days? What do you folks think? Is it just cultural caucasian man chinese girl?

Thank you,
Joshua