What a great article and so timely. I needed to read this because I have been giving myself a hard time with my ex's. I've had 3 major long term relationships in my life that ended up going no where and in all relationships, I was the one who was dumped. Talk about feeling rejection. I've also been in short term relationships in which I dumped the guys as well. Still I've had my heart broken a few times and it's not fun. I don't think I entered these relationships because I had a hidden subconscience desire to have something fulfilled but maybe in hindsight I did. I picked the guy living in another country to date for 3 years because maybe I was afraid of committment. Whatever happened in the past, I have truly learned and grown up. I used to think sex and love went hand in hand because in my mind it does, now I realize that to the men I was with, sex didn't mean as much to them as it did to me. I've learned to take things much slower and not to give my all to someone, not to love too hard. I've also learned not to put up with things that obviously make me unhappy just because I love someone. Love doesn't have to mean suffering. Yes indeed...I've learned. Now I feel I've grown and I'm a better person after going through the school of hard knocks. I'm ready for the man to come into my life that is ready willing and able to give and receive love on a mature level ready for committment. I hope the attraction is mutual. I'm looking forward to the next chapter in my life and I hope it will be great!