How to Feel Sexy No Matter What Your Age Is

By Allana Pratt, Sexy Mom Expert


How to Feel Sexy No Matter What Your Age Is

  • Are you a woman who avoids looking in the mirror because your thighs no longer look the way they did?
  • Do you feel that you've lost your worth because you've lost your youth and men your age go for women 20 years younger?
  • Can you not help but be envious of women thinner or younger than you, afraid you have no chance against them in finding true love?

Here's the truth. I was raised a dancer determining my value from my body. I became competitive with women, insecure unless I looked starving, preoccupied during dates wondering if he thought I was beautiful, willing to sell my soul to get attention and validation that I was enough. Within seconds of entering a room I could tell you who I was sexier than, who's man I could tempt away. Pretty sad.

Here's more truth. All my suffering was based on thinking my worth was on the outside not the inside. Now I've learned that being a woman is amazing. We are hot, wise and courageous. Yes, it hurts when a 20-year-old woman gets my date's attention for a moment, yet now I know my depth, power and confidence are the components that will make him devoted to me forever. Join me and become a woman who claims her worth BECAUSE of her age. Join me and become a woman who is the spark, the creative force in a passionate, profound and fulfilling relationship.

You can have anything you want.

Yet, when you're running on empty not taking care of yourself, being abusive to your body with little exercise or unkind thoughts, comparing yourself to others, complaining with other women about getting old, blaming the younger women for taking all the good guys or focusing on what's wrong not what's right about you…then you're in trouble.

It's time for us to get over the shame and insecurity, fill up our tanks, give ourselves permission for pleasure and courageously claim our feminine power, our inner and outer beauty. Nothing lasts forever, good or bad. Yes, we are a little more saggy than in our 20's, yet girlfriend - WE ARE ALIVE! So let's control what we can, let go of the rest and start having some fun embracing our age, wisdom, sassiness and power! Seriously it's that simple, yet not always easy.

As the Life Coach to Leeza Gibbons during "Dancing with the Stars", I can tell you one of her valid fears was showing her thighs (turning 50 that year) to 52 million people. Point taken. So I asked her to find a bigger 'Why' to join the show. What if she didn't do it to win, to look good, to prove anything? What if instead she inspired all women to live fully for the joy of being alive? She did so with grace, style and sass, at 50!

As a Sexy Mom Expert I have the pleasure of interviewing women like Linda Gray, Dr. Christiane Northrup, and even today Mary Ann Halpin, who photographed celebrity women who dared to approach aging with passion and courage. They all agree that at some point we have to stop making excuses for who we are, no longer give a hoot what others think of us, make peace with that little girl inside of us that wants attention, questions if she's enough and thinks she's here to please everyone.

We're here to shine our God given gifts, serve those we're here to serve and have some fun! Your man can only see you if YOU get how magnificent you are already, right now, at this age, with those hips, brilliant insights, sparkling eyes, and open heart.  The more you show up as YOU the more you will be blessed with attention, affection, adoration and celebration.

So embrace your age and be grateful you're alive. Acts of pleasure make you feel good so dance, have baths, walk in the woods, wear your favorite clothes, light candles at dinner, wear heels as you unload the dishwasher! And show up fully today and trust, that when you're least expecting it, there he'll be. In awe of the real YOU.

Blessings, deliciously yours,

Allana

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32 Comments View this thread in our community


Anonymous

March 21,2012 at 11:23 am

This advice is great, but I, at 52 have the challenge of unsexy Parkinson's disease to boot. It can play havoc with self image with the symptoms and all.

D_Lion

July 4,2011 at 05:57 pm

It's a decade-old data point.

suzyque

July 4,2011 at 04:31 pm

D_Lion: I have to concede your point ... I had the same experience with $50 k women demanding $150 k men: I was always ignored when I wrote them.

Outside of large extremes, I do think it's fine to reach outside of stated preferances. Although I admit I'm suspicious when a 20 - 25 woman writes me (which is common - and the suspicion is typically warranted), if a woman is 30 or 50 I'll usually read her profile, rather than make a knee-jerk reaction on age.

You go for 50K women DLion? Huh...misunderestimated you.

Trixie1968

July 4,2011 at 03:25 pm

NYCpigeon:
I think the srticle is suggesting that if you feel sexy, then others will notice this and be attracted to you.

Yeah, it is. It's mostly suggesting we stop feeling jealous of young girls and up our game which I find horribly patronising.

The article completely overlooks the fact that by the time you're, let's say in full bloom, you already know what's sexy about you (you'll have been told a few times) ~ knowing the ways in which you appear sexy is the one advantage we have over young girls!

:)

Trixie1968

July 4,2011 at 03:22 pm

D_Lion: Okay, this is Creepy! I am having ads for bikinis!

Wow! That is sexy.

D_Lion

July 4,2011 at 03:10 pm

Okay, this is Creepy! I am having ads for bikinis!

NYCpigeon

July 4,2011 at 03:09 pm

No, you don't have to appear sexy, in the sense of wearing see-through clothing or as the article suggested wearing high heels to do the dishes..

But if a person is sexually attracted to you then there is something sexy about you. It could be in the bridge of your nose.

I think the srticle is suggesting that if you feel sexy, then others will notice this and be attracted to you.

D_Lion

July 4,2011 at 03:07 pm

I have to concede your point ... I had the same experience with $50 k women demanding $150 k men: I was always ignored when I wrote them.

Outside of large extremes, I do think it's fine to reach outside of stated preferances. Although I admit I'm suspicious when a 20 - 25 woman writes me (which is common - and the suspicion is typically warranted), if a woman is 30 or 50 I'll usually read her profile, rather than make a knee-jerk reaction on age.

suzyque

July 4,2011 at 03:04 pm

Older men that are looking for a quality relationship that goes the distance, I would think would datewithin a few years of their age. Every once in a while you see one that works beautifully like LindseyK and NotYet...but typically there is a generation gap that is hard to bridge. A man that is looking for a cute young thing to parade around with and is taut and unlined - go for it. But they may not be there for you when you are 75.

I think I'm still cute at 45!

boomer_gal

July 4,2011 at 02:52 pm

D_Lion: This pertains only on eHarmony.

On a site like Match, you can message whoever you want.

Sure, you can. But how much sense is there in messaging a guy who has his preferences set at 20 to 30 years younger than you and he both are? If he's interested in 30 to 40 year olds, the chances are I will not stand up to the competition. I have on occasion messaged guys with upper limits set a few years younger than I am. They rarely respond. So sure, you can message anyone you want, but it's not likely to get you where you want to go. In my experience, any way.

ed to add... I sometimes feel like saying "OK, so you're really looking for a sweet young thing. How's that working for ya? Maybe it's time to consider someone closer to your own age?" But I figure that approach isn't going to get me where I want to go either. And if they're really looking for someone half our age, well I probably don't want them, either.


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