Are you Addicted to Drama?
Do you find your relationships mirroring daytime soap operas? If you're hooked on the adrenaline rush that comes along with the emotional roller coaster you've found yourself on, it might be time to get off the ride and start taking steps to be drama-free. Read on to see if you’re addicted to drama and what you can do to move on.
You Create Needless Drama in your Life
Your partner doesn’t answer your phone call so you send countless angry text messages or perhaps your date is running a few minutes late so the first thing you do when you see him is berate him with words. Sure, your partner might have stirred up the conflict but adding fuel to the fire doesn’t help. What will your angry text messages accomplish besides provoking a negative response? What will starting off your date as the antagonist solve?
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You Crave Attention
You might be using the attention, albeit negative, to affirm that you’re loved or concerned for. Think about the reaction you’re looking for and find the motivation behind what you are craving. Does a turbulent relationship give you a feeling of rush and excitement? Take the energy and excitement you get from the drama and place those feelings into improving your career, working out or taking up a new hobby.
You Can’t walk Away
Many people equate getting in the last word with winning the argument. In fact, some arguments are better put to rest at the moment, giving time for both parties to walk away and de-intensify the situation. If you find yourself letting the argument heighten, take a step back and tell your partner you’d rather take time for both of you to cool off and revisit the discussion another time, when the situation’s intense emotions have waned.
If you feel you might be addicted to drama it’s time to examine your past before you can work on your future. Take a look at the good parts of your prior relationships and what worked and what didn’t. Notice how you promoted the drama and what you can do in your next or current relationship to avoid it. In a relationship both partners should be actively trying to have most of the time they spend together to be positive and satisfying. There will be differences but if you’re choosing to provoke those occurrences or hold onto them, perhaps what you really want is the chaos and attention and not the other person.
Read on for similar articles in our Stages of Love road map!
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1Horselady
May 24,2011 at 11:59 pmI've been involved with my own family in their own share of drama. I've also had one guy who had to be the center of EVERYONE'S attention. He always had SOMETHING going on healthwise. What I have discovered is that once involved with these people it was next to IMPOSSIBLE to extricate yourself( physically and/or mentally) OUT of these relationships. If I see a new relationship of any kind headed that way, I head the opposite way-PRONTO! I've gotten to the point I don't even want to hear about it!All I want is the impossible-PEACE and QUIET!;)Suzie
SoulSurvivor
May 24,2011 at 11:16 pmInteresting, I guess im a recovering from that. Must say my love life is quite a soap opera. I guess most of it was the excitement of being, in a moment anyway, the most important thing in someones life. But when it becomes all about that person its hard to escape because in a way you know that you yourself aren't perfect.
acelticsteve
January 30,2011 at 12:18 amIt seems to me that adult childern of alcoholics are proned to be adicted to drama. Maybe it is a symptom of other problems.
misswright
January 29,2011 at 12:34 amI know that if things in any relation ship start play out as i televison show. and it is a sign to go even more so ......:eek: if you are dating them or in a relationship with,,. I use think that it was just DARMA QUEENS. But i know there seem to be a larger amount of DARMA KINGS, either way HE OR SHE are not the kind of people like to deal with..:o
Wiseman2
January 28,2011 at 10:51 amDrama belongs on TV, where you can turn it off!
^ ^ ^ ^This exactly
tweet37
January 28,2011 at 10:10 amYep, yep and yep.
OlderButWiser0549
January 28,2011 at 09:23 amYup.
DQ's can be very enchanting, very engaging; they are emotionally very "alive" and exciting, and that liveliness can quickly draw people into their orbit. They can also be a lot of fun, and the turmoil that follows in their wake can provide endless food for conversation.
But sooner or later, DQ's and their endless, pointless tumult become a pain in the rear.
They can be great for short-term flings. Long-term, not so much. And committed relationships, NEVER.
StPaulGirl
January 28,2011 at 09:06 amNope, but I sure do know a lot of men who seek them out!
Dropdeadredtx
January 28,2011 at 08:45 amNo, it's not presumptuous. Ever heard (or read) a guy say "Man, I sure do wish I could get me one of those drama queeens!" ?
Working in the arts as I do, drama and high emotions are everywhere in my daily life, so I seek out the opposite in my friendships and relationships. I like my drama onstage, thanks!:D
lunabeach
January 28,2011 at 07:02 amThat made me laugh :)
I had a stepsister who was a drama queen.
In high school, her ex-boyfriend came over to the house one day with his new girlfriend, who was pregnant, at the invitation of the step. Step and ex had been broken up for months, there was no overlap between her and the new gf. But all 3 stood out in the driveway yelling and weeping about who knows what. It was bizarre and inexplicable. The neighbor across the street stood and watched them - it was like an episode of Jerry Springer, completely uncharacteristic for the neighborhood.
I had more than enough drama to last a life time in the 4 yrs I lived with her. So long as the drama didn't involve me, I did enjoy witnessing it.
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